One Way Sports Kids Lose Confidence and the Solution

Sophie is a 7th grade cross-country runner who has trouble letting go of past losses. She assumes one loss will lead to another.

This is a common challenge for young athletes. They make generalizations about one bad game or race. If it happened once, they think, it will happen over and over.

What’s the problem? If kids assume one loss will lead to another, their confidence is low when they begin the next game or race. That’s not good. It can lead to worry, anxiety, or poor performances.

Kids like Sophie who struggle with this issue need to learn how to stop making false generalizations.

What’s more, they need to play or run in the present. That means focusing on the things they need to do right now to perform their best. For Sophie, for example, that might mean focusing on her strategy for the race—following a competitor closely, for example.

Sophie has some good ideas about getting through mental game issues like this one and boosting her confidence. She often uses positive self-talk to boost her confidence. She reminds herself that she’s been successful many times in the past. She tells herself she can do it again.

There are many ways you as sports parents and coaches can help boost the confidence of kids who carry past losses into the present. Be sure to remind them of their strengths. Ensure their practices are fun, engaging and productive.

Remind your athletes of what they need to do to perform in the present—whether it’s closely following a competitor, or focusing on making good shots on goal. Most important, don’t remind your sports kids of their past losses—especially before a performance or game!

Want to learn more about how to improve kids’ confidence and your sports parenting skills?

You and your young athletes can watch our new video series, “Inside the Minds of Young Athletes,” where we interview Sophie and other athletes and provide commentary and mental game tips.

If you’re already a Kids’ Sports Psychology member, you can watch Sophie’s video here:

Sophie’s ‘Inside the Minds of Young Athletes’ Video

Sincerely,

Patrick Cohn, Ph.D. and Lisa Cohn

P.S. We recently received very positive feedback from a new Kids’ Sports Psychology member:

Kids’ Sports Psychology quite a find. It’s a treasure trove of practical, insightful information presented in an organized, simple format that is so easy to use. It is exactly what I was looking for to help my daughter succeed in competition, as much as she succeeds during practice. Thank you so much!

~Stephanie Dobbs, Sports Parent and member at Kids’ Sports Psychology