{"id":1475,"date":"2011-11-03T19:21:39","date_gmt":"2011-11-03T19:21:39","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.youthsportspsychology.com\/youth_sports_psychology_blog\/?p=1475"},"modified":"2025-08-07T02:14:32","modified_gmt":"2025-08-07T06:14:32","slug":"how-parents-emotions-affect-sports-kids","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.youthsportspsychology.com\/youth_sports_psychology_blog\/how-parents-emotions-affect-sports-kids\/","title":{"rendered":"How Parents\u2019 Emotions Affect Sports Kids"},"content":{"rendered":"\n<h2 class=\"wp-block-heading has-text-align-center\"><span class=\"ez-toc-section\" id=\"Sports_Parents_Influence_on_Kids\"><\/span>Sports Parents Influence on Kids<span class=\"ez-toc-section-end\"><\/span><\/h2><div id=\"ez-toc-container\" class=\"ez-toc-v2_0_83 ez-toc-wrap-center counter-hierarchy ez-toc-counter ez-toc-grey ez-toc-container-direction\">\n<div class=\"ez-toc-title-container\">\n<p class=\"ez-toc-title\" style=\"cursor:inherit\">Table of Contents<\/p>\n<span class=\"ez-toc-title-toggle\"><a href=\"#\" class=\"ez-toc-pull-right ez-toc-btn ez-toc-btn-xs ez-toc-btn-default ez-toc-toggle\" aria-label=\"Toggle Table of Content\"><span class=\"ez-toc-js-icon-con\"><span class=\"\"><span class=\"eztoc-hide\" style=\"display:none;\">Toggle<\/span><span class=\"ez-toc-icon-toggle-span\"><svg style=\"fill: #999;color:#999\" xmlns=\"http:\/\/www.w3.org\/2000\/svg\" class=\"list-377408\" width=\"20px\" height=\"20px\" viewBox=\"0 0 24 24\" fill=\"none\"><path d=\"M6 6H4v2h2V6zm14 0H8v2h12V6zM4 11h2v2H4v-2zm16 0H8v2h12v-2zM4 16h2v2H4v-2zm16 0H8v2h12v-2z\" fill=\"currentColor\"><\/path><\/svg><svg style=\"fill: #999;color:#999\" class=\"arrow-unsorted-368013\" xmlns=\"http:\/\/www.w3.org\/2000\/svg\" width=\"10px\" height=\"10px\" viewBox=\"0 0 24 24\" version=\"1.2\" baseProfile=\"tiny\"><path d=\"M18.2 9.3l-6.2-6.3-6.2 6.3c-.2.2-.3.4-.3.7s.1.5.3.7c.2.2.4.3.7.3h11c.3 0 .5-.1.7-.3.2-.2.3-.5.3-.7s-.1-.5-.3-.7zM5.8 14.7l6.2 6.3 6.2-6.3c.2-.2.3-.5.3-.7s-.1-.5-.3-.7c-.2-.2-.4-.3-.7-.3h-11c-.3 0-.5.1-.7.3-.2.2-.3.5-.3.7s.1.5.3.7z\"\/><\/svg><\/span><\/span><\/span><\/a><\/span><\/div>\n<nav><ul class='ez-toc-list ez-toc-list-level-1 ' ><li class='ez-toc-page-1 ez-toc-heading-level-2'><a class=\"ez-toc-link ez-toc-heading-1\" href=\"https:\/\/www.youthsportspsychology.com\/youth_sports_psychology_blog\/how-parents-emotions-affect-sports-kids\/#Sports_Parents_Influence_on_Kids\" >Sports Parents Influence on Kids<\/a><ul class='ez-toc-list-level-4' ><li class='ez-toc-heading-level-4'><ul class='ez-toc-list-level-4' ><li class='ez-toc-heading-level-4'><a class=\"ez-toc-link ez-toc-heading-2\" href=\"https:\/\/www.youthsportspsychology.com\/youth_sports_psychology_blog\/how-parents-emotions-affect-sports-kids\/#A_month_later_the_kids_of_these_parents_reported_that_their_confidence_and_self-esteem_had_improved_he_says\" >A month later, the kids of these parents reported that their confidence and self-esteem had improved, he says.<\/a><\/li><li class='ez-toc-page-1 ez-toc-heading-level-4'><a class=\"ez-toc-link ez-toc-heading-3\" href=\"https:\/\/www.youthsportspsychology.com\/youth_sports_psychology_blog\/how-parents-emotions-affect-sports-kids\/#Rosss_ideas_about_emotional_sports_parents_are_fascinating_and_certainly_something_for_sports_parents_to_consider\" >Ross\u2019s ideas about emotional sports parents are fascinating and certainly something for sports parents to consider.<\/a><\/li><\/ul><\/li><li class='ez-toc-page-1 ez-toc-heading-level-3'><a class=\"ez-toc-link ez-toc-heading-4\" href=\"https:\/\/www.youthsportspsychology.com\/youth_sports_psychology_blog\/how-parents-emotions-affect-sports-kids\/#To_listen_to_the_first_half_of_this_interview_use_the_player_below\" >To listen to the first half of this interview, use the player below:<\/a><\/li><li class='ez-toc-page-1 ez-toc-heading-level-3'><a class=\"ez-toc-link ez-toc-heading-5\" href=\"https:\/\/www.youthsportspsychology.com\/youth_sports_psychology_blog\/how-parents-emotions-affect-sports-kids\/#Related_Articles_on_Youth_Sports\" >Related Articles on Youth Sports:<\/a><\/li><li class='ez-toc-page-1 ez-toc-heading-level-3'><a class=\"ez-toc-link ez-toc-heading-6\" href=\"https:\/\/www.youthsportspsychology.com\/youth_sports_psychology_blog\/how-parents-emotions-affect-sports-kids\/#Help_Young_Athletes_Boost_Confidence_in_Sports\" >Help Young Athletes Boost Confidence in Sports!<\/a><\/li><\/ul><\/li><\/ul><\/nav><\/div>\n\n\n\n<div class=\"wp-block-image\">\n<figure class=\"alignleft is-resized\"><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" width=\"300\" height=\"300\" src=\"https:\/\/www.youthsportspsychology.com\/youth_sports_psychology_blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2010\/10\/youth-sports-podcast-new.jpg\" alt=\"Ultimate Sports Parent Podcast\" class=\"wp-image-3780\" style=\"width:164px;height:auto\" srcset=\"https:\/\/www.youthsportspsychology.com\/youth_sports_psychology_blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2010\/10\/youth-sports-podcast-new.jpg 300w, https:\/\/www.youthsportspsychology.com\/youth_sports_psychology_blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2010\/10\/youth-sports-podcast-new-150x150.jpg 150w\" sizes=\"auto, (max-width: 300px) 100vw, 300px\" \/><\/figure>\n<\/div>\n\n\n<p><strong>Let\u2019s face it:<\/strong> The world of sports evokes lots of <strong>emotion.<\/strong> That\u2019s partially why we love sports so much. But as sports parents, your emotional state affects your kids\u2019 <strong>confidence<\/strong> in sports. In fact, if you can\u2019t keep your feelings under control, your athletes might not thrive in sports.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>That\u2019s the word from Anthony Ross, a <strong>sport psychologist,<\/strong> former All-American tennis player and director of <a href=\"https:\/\/www.youtube.com\/watch?v=C-oQf7jxlus\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener noreferrer\">SportParentSupport.com<\/a>, who conducted research at the University of Queensland into how sports parents influence their kids\u2019 development and well-being in sports&#8211;and life.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>Ross\u2019s research looked at what sports parents can do to foster well-being in their young athletes. He worked with 60 kids and parents, and asked the parents to watch a 40-minute video and read a booklet explaining how to be better sports parents.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<h4 class=\"wp-block-heading\"><span class=\"ez-toc-section\" id=\"A_month_later_the_kids_of_these_parents_reported_that_their_confidence_and_self-esteem_had_improved_he_says\"><\/span>A month later, the kids of these parents reported that their <strong>confidence and self-esteem<\/strong> had improved, he says.<span class=\"ez-toc-section-end\"><\/span><\/h4>\n\n\n\n<p><em>\u201cThe main thing that came out of this research: Parents should communicate unconditional love and empathy and <strong>focus<\/strong> on kids\u2019 strengths,\u201d<\/em> says Ross.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>Perhaps what was most interesting&#8211;and likely most controversial to you sports parents&#8211;as what Ross learned about <strong>sports parents<\/strong> who can\u2019t keep their emotions under control.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>Using research about how the brain interprets emotions, Ross found that parents who can\u2019t keep their feelings under control have a hard time applying tips about how to improve their sports parenting skills.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>Why? This is the controversial part&#8211;the part that you may or may not agree with. Ross found that sports triggers <strong>emotional<\/strong> experiences from these sports parents\u2019 childhoods&#8211;and the parents are generally unaware that this is happening to them.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p><em>\u201cFor example, if a parent during his own childhood, felt a sense of disapproval when he didn\u2019t perform well, it would lead him to feel a sense of shame and not as worthy.\u201d<\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>Then, years later, when this parent saw his child perform badly, it would evoke the same sense of shame about performing badly. <em>\u201cThe parent may not want kids to feel that, or might become angry, and will do their best so the child performs better.\u201d<\/em> That often translates to yelling during games and <strong>pressuring<\/strong> kids.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>Ross\u2019s suggestion to these <strong>emotional-in-sports<\/strong> parents is to reflect on their childhoods and try to understand what pushes their buttons&#8211;and then try to change their behavior in youth sports.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<h4 class=\"wp-block-heading\"><span class=\"ez-toc-section\" id=\"Rosss_ideas_about_emotional_sports_parents_are_fascinating_and_certainly_something_for_sports_parents_to_consider\"><\/span>Ross\u2019s ideas about <strong>emotional sports parents<\/strong> are fascinating and certainly something for sports parents to consider.<span class=\"ez-toc-section-end\"><\/span><\/h4>\n\n\n\n<p>Here at Kids\u2019 Sports Psychology, we agree with his first conclusion: That sports parents need to communicate love and empathy and focus on what kids do well. If parents <strong>focus<\/strong> too much on negatives, kids will, too. That can cause them to embrace negative <strong>self-talk, focus<\/strong> more on avoiding mistakes, and stop taking risks\u2014all <strong>mental game<\/strong> no-nos!<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>Want to learn more about how to improve your sports parenting skills? Whether you agree with Ross or not, you should listen to our fascinating interview with him called <em>\u201cHow Sports Parents\u2019 Emotions Affect Their Kids\u2019 Sports Experience.\u201d<\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n<h3 class=\"wp-block-heading\"><span class=\"ez-toc-section\" id=\"To_listen_to_the_first_half_of_this_interview_use_the_player_below\"><\/span>To listen to the first half of this interview, use the player below:<span class=\"ez-toc-section-end\"><\/span><\/h3>\n\n\n\n<iframe loading=\"lazy\" title=\"Libsyn Player\" style=\"border: none\" src=\"\/\/html5-player.libsyn.com\/embed\/episode\/id\/21565463\/height\/90\/theme\/custom\/thumbnail\/yes\/direction\/forward\/render-playlist\/no\/custom-color\/4188b5\/\" height=\"90\" width=\"100%\" scrolling=\"no\"  allowfullscreen webkitallowfullscreen mozallowfullscreen oallowfullscreen msallowfullscreen><\/iframe>\n\n\n\n<hr class=\"wp-block-separator has-alpha-channel-opacity is-style-dots\"\/>\n\n\n\n<h3 class=\"wp-block-heading\" id=\"related-articles-on-hockey-mental-game\"><span class=\"ez-toc-section\" id=\"Related_Articles_on_Youth_Sports\"><\/span>Related Articles on Youth Sports:<span class=\"ez-toc-section-end\"><\/span><\/h3>\n\n\n\n<ul class=\"wp-block-list\">\n<li><a href=\"https:\/\/www.youthsportspsychology.com\/youth_sports_psychology_blog\/letting-go-of-sports-kids-during-games-and-practice\/\"><strong>Letting Go of Sports Kids During Practice and Competition<\/strong><\/a><\/li>\n\n\n\n<li><a href=\"https:\/\/www.youthsportspsychology.com\/youth_sports_psychology_blog\/testimonials\/\"><strong>Parent and Coach Testimonials<\/strong><\/a><\/li>\n\n\n\n<li><a href=\"https:\/\/www.youthsportspsychology.com\/youth_sports_psychology_blog\/why-the-mental-game-is-as-important-as-talent-for-young-athletes\/\"><strong>Why The Mental Game is as Important as Talent For Young Athletes<\/strong><\/a><\/li>\n<\/ul>\n\n\n\n<p id=\"block-f49818fa-7c7a-4ee3-b5ee-66581aad2c71\">*Subscribe to<strong>\u00a0<a href=\"https:\/\/podcasts.apple.com\/us\/podcast\/sports-psychology-podcast-by-peaksports-com\/id152566009\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noreferrer noopener\">The Sports Psychology Podcast<\/a><\/strong>\u00a0on iTunes<br>*Subscribe to <a href=\"https:\/\/open.spotify.com\/show\/0ynyaalKxbnNmsoeL8gF5X?si=8224669de9b3435b\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noreferrer noopener\"><strong>The Sports Psychology Podcast<\/strong><\/a> on Spotify<\/p>\n\n\n\n<hr class=\"wp-block-separator has-alpha-channel-opacity is-style-dots\"\/>\n\n\n\n<h3 class=\"wp-block-heading\"><span class=\"ez-toc-section\" id=\"Help_Young_Athletes_Boost_Confidence_in_Sports\"><\/span>Help Young Athletes Boost Confidence in Sports!<span class=\"ez-toc-section-end\"><\/span><\/h3>\n\n\n<div class=\"wp-block-image\">\n<figure class=\"alignright size-full is-resized\"><a href=\"https:\/\/www.youthsportspsychology.com\/youth_sports_psychology_blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2018\/10\/ultimate-sports-parent-small.jpg\"><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" width=\"225\" height=\"250\" src=\"https:\/\/www.youthsportspsychology.com\/youth_sports_psychology_blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2018\/10\/ultimate-sports-parent-small.jpg\" alt=\"The Ultimate Sports Parent\" class=\"wp-image-11157\" style=\"width:167px;height:auto\"\/><\/a><\/figure>\n<\/div>\n\n\n<p>Every day, we receive letters from parents like you who want their children and teens to excel in sports. However, these parents can <strong>see fear, doubt, and frustration on the faces of their kids<\/strong> who struggle with the \u201cinner\u201d game of sports. But these parents have no idea how to help their kids <strong>overcome the worries, expectations and self-defeating thoughts<\/strong> that prevent their young athletes from feeling confident and successful.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>You can benefit from our 1<strong>5-plus years\u2019 of work in sports psychology and sports parenting research<\/strong>. Now, you can <strong>tap into our secrets to sports success<\/strong> through a cutting-edge, 14-day program that helps young athletes overcome the top \u201cmental game\u201d challenges that sports parents face\u2014and the top <strong>challenges young athletes face<\/strong>.<\/p>\n\n\n<div class=\"gb-container gb-container-fbab03ed\">\n\n<a class=\"gb-button gb-button-fa7bf2e7 gb-button-text\" href=\"https:\/\/www.peaksports.com\/ultimate-sports-parent-workbook-cd-program\/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener noreferrer\">GET DETAILS<\/a>\n\n\n\n<a class=\"gb-button gb-button-33bcee1d gb-button-text\" href=\"https:\/\/shop.peaksports.com\/products\/the-ultimate-sports-parent-digital\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener noreferrer\">BUY NOW<\/a>\n\n<\/div>","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>Sports Parents Influence on Kids Let\u2019s face it: The world of sports evokes lots of emotion. That\u2019s partially why we love sports so much. But as sports parents, your emotional state affects your kids\u2019 confidence in sports. In fact, if you can\u2019t keep your feelings under control, your athletes might &#8230; <a title=\"How Parents\u2019 Emotions Affect Sports Kids\" class=\"read-more\" href=\"https:\/\/www.youthsportspsychology.com\/youth_sports_psychology_blog\/how-parents-emotions-affect-sports-kids\/\" aria-label=\"Read more about How Parents\u2019 Emotions Affect Sports Kids\">Read Sport Psychology Tip<\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":3780,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[15,6],"tags":[444,445,46,321],"class_list":["post-1475","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-sports-parent-podcast","category-youth-sports-psychology-blog","tag-parents-emotions-affect-sports-kids","tag-sports-parent","tag-sports-psychology","tag-young-athletes"],"aioseo_notices":[],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.youthsportspsychology.com\/youth_sports_psychology_blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1475","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.youthsportspsychology.com\/youth_sports_psychology_blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.youthsportspsychology.com\/youth_sports_psychology_blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.youthsportspsychology.com\/youth_sports_psychology_blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.youthsportspsychology.com\/youth_sports_psychology_blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=1475"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/www.youthsportspsychology.com\/youth_sports_psychology_blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1475\/revisions"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.youthsportspsychology.com\/youth_sports_psychology_blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/3780"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.youthsportspsychology.com\/youth_sports_psychology_blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=1475"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.youthsportspsychology.com\/youth_sports_psychology_blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=1475"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.youthsportspsychology.com\/youth_sports_psychology_blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=1475"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}