{"id":1521,"date":"2011-12-15T19:58:29","date_gmt":"2011-12-15T19:58:29","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.youthsportspsychology.com\/youth_sports_psychology_blog\/?p=1521"},"modified":"2025-08-07T02:07:18","modified_gmt":"2025-08-07T06:07:18","slug":"giving-hot-headed-sports-parents-a-break","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.youthsportspsychology.com\/youth_sports_psychology_blog\/giving-hot-headed-sports-parents-a-break\/","title":{"rendered":"Giving Hot-Headed Sports Parents A Break"},"content":{"rendered":"<div class=\"wp-block-image\">\n<figure class=\"aligncenter\"><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" width=\"600\" height=\"300\" src=\"https:\/\/www.youthsportspsychology.com\/youth_sports_psychology_blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2016\/12\/why-sports-parents-need-perspective.jpg\" alt=\"Youth Sports Psychology\" class=\"wp-image-3744\" srcset=\"https:\/\/www.youthsportspsychology.com\/youth_sports_psychology_blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2016\/12\/why-sports-parents-need-perspective.jpg 600w, https:\/\/www.youthsportspsychology.com\/youth_sports_psychology_blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2016\/12\/why-sports-parents-need-perspective-300x150.jpg 300w\" sizes=\"auto, (max-width: 600px) 100vw, 600px\" \/><\/figure>\n<\/div>\n\n\n<h2 class=\"wp-block-heading has-text-align-center\"><span class=\"ez-toc-section\" id=\"Sports_Parents_Who_Experience_Strong_Emotions\"><\/span>Sports Parents Who Experience Strong Emotions<span class=\"ez-toc-section-end\"><\/span><\/h2><div id=\"ez-toc-container\" class=\"ez-toc-v2_0_82_2 ez-toc-wrap-center counter-hierarchy ez-toc-counter ez-toc-grey ez-toc-container-direction\">\n<div class=\"ez-toc-title-container\">\n<p class=\"ez-toc-title\" style=\"cursor:inherit\">Table of Contents<\/p>\n<span class=\"ez-toc-title-toggle\"><a href=\"#\" class=\"ez-toc-pull-right ez-toc-btn ez-toc-btn-xs ez-toc-btn-default ez-toc-toggle\" aria-label=\"Toggle Table of Content\"><span class=\"ez-toc-js-icon-con\"><span class=\"\"><span class=\"eztoc-hide\" style=\"display:none;\">Toggle<\/span><span class=\"ez-toc-icon-toggle-span\"><svg style=\"fill: #999;color:#999\" xmlns=\"http:\/\/www.w3.org\/2000\/svg\" class=\"list-377408\" width=\"20px\" height=\"20px\" viewBox=\"0 0 24 24\" fill=\"none\"><path d=\"M6 6H4v2h2V6zm14 0H8v2h12V6zM4 11h2v2H4v-2zm16 0H8v2h12v-2zM4 16h2v2H4v-2zm16 0H8v2h12v-2z\" fill=\"currentColor\"><\/path><\/svg><svg style=\"fill: #999;color:#999\" class=\"arrow-unsorted-368013\" xmlns=\"http:\/\/www.w3.org\/2000\/svg\" width=\"10px\" height=\"10px\" viewBox=\"0 0 24 24\" version=\"1.2\" baseProfile=\"tiny\"><path d=\"M18.2 9.3l-6.2-6.3-6.2 6.3c-.2.2-.3.4-.3.7s.1.5.3.7c.2.2.4.3.7.3h11c.3 0 .5-.1.7-.3.2-.2.3-.5.3-.7s-.1-.5-.3-.7zM5.8 14.7l6.2 6.3 6.2-6.3c.2-.2.3-.5.3-.7s-.1-.5-.3-.7c-.2-.2-.4-.3-.7-.3h-11c-.3 0-.5.1-.7.3-.2.2-.3.5-.3.7s.1.5.3.7z\"\/><\/svg><\/span><\/span><\/span><\/a><\/span><\/div>\n<nav><ul class='ez-toc-list ez-toc-list-level-1 ' ><li class='ez-toc-page-1 ez-toc-heading-level-2'><a class=\"ez-toc-link ez-toc-heading-1\" href=\"https:\/\/www.youthsportspsychology.com\/youth_sports_psychology_blog\/giving-hot-headed-sports-parents-a-break\/#Sports_Parents_Who_Experience_Strong_Emotions\" >Sports Parents Who Experience Strong Emotions<\/a><ul class='ez-toc-list-level-3' ><li class='ez-toc-heading-level-3'><a class=\"ez-toc-link ez-toc-heading-2\" href=\"https:\/\/www.youthsportspsychology.com\/youth_sports_psychology_blog\/giving-hot-headed-sports-parents-a-break\/#Keeping_their_Composure\" >Keeping their Composure<\/a><ul class='ez-toc-list-level-4' ><li class='ez-toc-heading-level-4'><a class=\"ez-toc-link ez-toc-heading-3\" href=\"https:\/\/www.youthsportspsychology.com\/youth_sports_psychology_blog\/giving-hot-headed-sports-parents-a-break\/#Peter_says_parents_are_capable_of_changing_their_behavior\" >Peter says parents are capable of changing their behavior.<\/a><\/li><\/ul><\/li><li class='ez-toc-page-1 ez-toc-heading-level-3'><a class=\"ez-toc-link ez-toc-heading-4\" href=\"https:\/\/www.youthsportspsychology.com\/youth_sports_psychology_blog\/giving-hot-headed-sports-parents-a-break\/#Related_Articles_on_Youth_Sports\" >Related Articles on Youth Sports:<\/a><\/li><li class='ez-toc-page-1 ez-toc-heading-level-3'><a class=\"ez-toc-link ez-toc-heading-5\" href=\"https:\/\/www.youthsportspsychology.com\/youth_sports_psychology_blog\/giving-hot-headed-sports-parents-a-break\/#Help_Young_Athletes_Boost_Confidence_in_Sports\" >Help Young Athletes Boost Confidence in Sports!<\/a><\/li><\/ul><\/li><\/ul><\/nav><\/div>\n\n\n\n\n<p class=\"has-text-align-left\">It\u2019s true sports parents too often get hot under the collar and yell at coaches, refs and even their sports kids during games. But critics need to show these parents some empathy and give them a break.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>That\u2019s the word from Nancy Peter, director of the out-of-school time resource center at the University of Pennsylvania who studied why parents can get out of hand in youth sports.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>Peter is quick to confess that she found herself experiencing strong emotions when her son played competitive baseball. To better understand what was going on, she did some research into her local little league.&nbsp; She sent parents involved in the little league a survey, observed numerous games, and interviewed parents in person.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>Peter concluded that many parents, like herself, experience strong emotions when they\u2019re watching youth sports.&nbsp; These feelings are triggered by a number of factors\u2014including <strong>pride, anxiety,<\/strong> and a primal drive to <strong>protect<\/strong> their kids, she says.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<h3 class=\"wp-block-heading\"><span class=\"ez-toc-section\" id=\"Keeping_their_Composure\"><\/span>Keeping their Composure<span class=\"ez-toc-section-end\"><\/span><\/h3>\n\n\n\n<p>&#8220;<em>Parents need to be aware of these <strong>strong feelings,<\/strong> learn to be good <strong>sports parents<\/strong> and moderate their behavior,<\/em>&#8221; Peter says. &#8220;<em>Feelings aren\u2019t facts<\/em>,&#8221; she says,&nbsp;<em>\u201cYou don\u2019t have to act on strong feelings; you have a filter.&#8221;<\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n<p><em>\u201cMy big recommendation is not to be punitive to parents but approach them with empathy. For some parents, this is a new experience,\u201d<\/em> s<em>ays<\/em> Peter.<em> \u201cThey are not innately bad or insensitive.\u201d<\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n<p><em>&#8220;Coaches and leagues need to give parents <strong>resources<\/strong> to help <strong>educate<\/strong> them,&#8221;<\/em> Peter says.<em> &#8220;In addition, coaches and leagues need to help parents brace for situations that will prompt strong emotions,&#8221; <\/em>she says.<em> \u201cIf there\u2019s a high-stakes game, send a reminder to parents. \u2018You will be stressed&#8230; Don\u2019t humiliate or degrade children. Don\u2019t get in the way of coaches.&#8221;<\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>What\u2019s more, Peter concluded that sports kids are more <strong>resilient<\/strong> than parents think they are.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p><em>\u201cOver the years, kids learn to bounce back,\u201d<\/em> she says. <em>\u201cParents sometimes don\u2019t give kids credit for being able to bounce back.<\/em>&nbsp;<em>Instead, they\u2019re over-protective. They end up embarrassing the child and removing the opportunity for the kid to cope,\u201d<\/em> she says.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<h4 class=\"wp-block-heading\"><span class=\"ez-toc-section\" id=\"Peter_says_parents_are_capable_of_changing_their_behavior\"><\/span>Peter says parents are capable of changing their behavior.<span class=\"ez-toc-section-end\"><\/span><\/h4>\n\n\n\n<p><em>\u201cI did,\u201d<\/em> she says.<em> \u201cMy feelings haven\u2019t changed much, but my actions have changed.\u201d<\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>Want to learn more about how to be great sports parents, and to help your kids make the most of their sports experience?<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>At Kids\u2019 Sports Psychology, we have loads of resources for you\u2014including our interview with Peter. You can listen to hear about her own experiences, why and how she conducted her study, and what she concluded about sports parents.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>To listen to the first half of the interview with Peter, use the player below:<\/p>\n\n\n\n<audio class=\"wp-audio-shortcode\" id=\"audio-1521-1\" preload=\"none\" style=\"width: 100%;\" controls=\"controls\"><source type=\"audio\/mpeg\" src=\"http:\/\/lisacohn.audioacrobat.com\/download\/dccded74-1c5a-10fc-a633-4e5c4c2dca02.mp3?_=1\" \/><a href=\"http:\/\/lisacohn.audioacrobat.com\/download\/dccded74-1c5a-10fc-a633-4e5c4c2dca02.mp3\">http:\/\/lisacohn.audioacrobat.com\/download\/dccded74-1c5a-10fc-a633-4e5c4c2dca02.mp3<\/a><\/audio>\n\n\n\n<hr class=\"wp-block-separator has-alpha-channel-opacity is-style-dots\"\/>\n\n\n\n<h3 class=\"wp-block-heading\" id=\"related-articles-on-hockey-mental-game\"><span class=\"ez-toc-section\" id=\"Related_Articles_on_Youth_Sports\"><\/span>Related Articles on Youth Sports:<span class=\"ez-toc-section-end\"><\/span><\/h3>\n\n\n\n<ul class=\"wp-block-list\">\n<li><a href=\"https:\/\/www.youthsportspsychology.com\/youth_sports_psychology_blog\/how-to-help-athletes-break-out-of-losing-streaks\/\"><strong>How to Help Athletes Break Out of Losing Streaks<\/strong><\/a><\/li>\n\n\n\n<li><a href=\"https:\/\/www.youthsportspsychology.com\/youth_sports_psychology_blog\/sports-parents-learn-from-simone-biles-twisties-during-the-olympics\/\"><strong>Sports Parents: Learn from Simone Biles\u2019 \u201cTwisties\u201d During the Olympics?<\/strong><\/a><\/li>\n\n\n\n<li><a href=\"https:\/\/www.youthsportspsychology.com\/youth_sports_psychology_blog\/how-parents-can-encourage-kids-without-pressure\/\"><strong>How Parents Can Encourage Kids Without Pressure<\/strong><\/a><\/li>\n<\/ul>\n\n\n\n<p id=\"block-f49818fa-7c7a-4ee3-b5ee-66581aad2c71\">*Subscribe to\u00a0<a href=\"https:\/\/podcasts.apple.com\/us\/podcast\/sports-psychology-podcast-by-peaksports-com\/id152566009\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noreferrer noopener\"><strong>The Sports Psychology Podcast<\/strong><\/a>\u00a0on iTunes<br>*Subscribe to <a href=\"https:\/\/open.spotify.com\/show\/0ynyaalKxbnNmsoeL8gF5X?si=8224669de9b3435b\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noreferrer noopener\"><strong>The Sports Psychology Podcast<\/strong><\/a> on Spotify<\/p>\n\n\n\n<hr class=\"wp-block-separator has-alpha-channel-opacity is-style-dots\"\/>\n\n\n\n<h3 class=\"wp-block-heading\"><span class=\"ez-toc-section\" id=\"Help_Young_Athletes_Boost_Confidence_in_Sports\"><\/span>Help Young Athletes Boost Confidence in Sports!<span class=\"ez-toc-section-end\"><\/span><\/h3>\n\n\n<div class=\"wp-block-image\">\n<figure class=\"alignright size-full is-resized\"><a href=\"https:\/\/www.youthsportspsychology.com\/youth_sports_psychology_blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2018\/10\/ultimate-sports-parent-small.jpg\"><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" width=\"225\" height=\"250\" src=\"https:\/\/www.youthsportspsychology.com\/youth_sports_psychology_blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2018\/10\/ultimate-sports-parent-small.jpg\" alt=\"The Ultimate Sports Parent\" class=\"wp-image-11157\" style=\"width:167px;height:auto\"\/><\/a><\/figure>\n<\/div>\n\n\n<p>Every day, we receive letters from parents like you who want their children and teens to excel in sports. However, these parents can <strong>see fear, doubt, and frustration on the faces of their kids<\/strong> who struggle with the \u201cinner\u201d game of sports. But these parents have no idea how to help their kids <strong>overcome the worries, expectations and self-defeating thoughts<\/strong> that prevent their young athletes from feeling confident and successful.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>You can benefit from our 1<strong>5-plus years\u2019 of work in sports psychology and sports parenting research<\/strong>. Now, you can <strong>tap into our secrets to sports success<\/strong> through a cutting-edge, 14-day program that helps young athletes overcome the top \u201cmental game\u201d challenges that sports parents face\u2014and the top <strong>challenges young athletes face<\/strong>.<\/p>\n\n\n<div class=\"gb-container gb-container-fbab03ed\">\n\n<a class=\"gb-button gb-button-fa7bf2e7 gb-button-text\" href=\"https:\/\/www.peaksports.com\/ultimate-sports-parent-workbook-cd-program\/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener noreferrer\">GET DETAILS<\/a>\n\n\n\n<a class=\"gb-button gb-button-33bcee1d gb-button-text\" href=\"https:\/\/shop.peaksports.com\/products\/the-ultimate-sports-parent-digital\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener noreferrer\">BUY NOW<\/a>\n\n<\/div>","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>Sports Parents Who Experience Strong Emotions It\u2019s true sports parents too often get hot under the collar and yell at coaches, refs and even their sports kids during games. But critics need to show these parents some empathy and give them a break. That\u2019s the word from Nancy Peter, director &#8230; <a title=\"Giving Hot-Headed Sports Parents A Break\" class=\"read-more\" href=\"https:\/\/www.youthsportspsychology.com\/youth_sports_psychology_blog\/giving-hot-headed-sports-parents-a-break\/\" aria-label=\"Read more about Giving Hot-Headed Sports Parents A Break\">Read Sport Psychology Tip<\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":3743,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[14,6],"tags":[219,218,220,182],"class_list":["post-1521","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-youth-sports-podcast","category-youth-sports-psychology-blog","tag-controlling-emotions-during-sports","tag-parents-emotions","tag-sports-emotion","tag-sports-parents","resize-featured-image"],"aioseo_notices":[],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.youthsportspsychology.com\/youth_sports_psychology_blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1521","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.youthsportspsychology.com\/youth_sports_psychology_blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.youthsportspsychology.com\/youth_sports_psychology_blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.youthsportspsychology.com\/youth_sports_psychology_blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.youthsportspsychology.com\/youth_sports_psychology_blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=1521"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/www.youthsportspsychology.com\/youth_sports_psychology_blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1521\/revisions"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.youthsportspsychology.com\/youth_sports_psychology_blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/3743"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.youthsportspsychology.com\/youth_sports_psychology_blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=1521"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.youthsportspsychology.com\/youth_sports_psychology_blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=1521"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.youthsportspsychology.com\/youth_sports_psychology_blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=1521"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}