{"id":1919,"date":"2013-04-11T16:03:14","date_gmt":"2013-04-11T16:03:14","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.youthsportspsychology.com\/youth_sports_psychology_blog\/?p=1919"},"modified":"2025-07-23T07:38:53","modified_gmt":"2025-07-23T11:38:53","slug":"how-perfectionism-hurts-confidence-in-young-athletes","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.youthsportspsychology.com\/youth_sports_psychology_blog\/how-perfectionism-hurts-confidence-in-young-athletes\/","title":{"rendered":"How Perfectionism Hurts Confidence in Young Athletes"},"content":{"rendered":"\n<h2 class=\"wp-block-heading has-text-align-center\"><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" width=\"600\" height=\"300\" class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-3417\" src=\"https:\/\/www.youthsportspsychology.com\/youth_sports_psychology_blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2016\/11\/how-does-perfectionism-hold-back-kids-in-sports.jpg\" alt=\"Youth Sports Psychology\" srcset=\"https:\/\/www.youthsportspsychology.com\/youth_sports_psychology_blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2016\/11\/how-does-perfectionism-hold-back-kids-in-sports.jpg 600w, https:\/\/www.youthsportspsychology.com\/youth_sports_psychology_blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2016\/11\/how-does-perfectionism-hold-back-kids-in-sports-300x150.jpg 300w\" sizes=\"auto, (max-width: 600px) 100vw, 600px\" \/><\/h2>\n\n\n\n<h2 class=\"wp-block-heading has-text-align-center\"><span class=\"ez-toc-section\" id=\"Perfectionism_in_Sports_Hurts_Confidence\"><\/span>Perfectionism in Sports Hurts Confidence<span class=\"ez-toc-section-end\"><\/span><\/h2><div id=\"ez-toc-container\" class=\"ez-toc-v2_0_83 ez-toc-wrap-center counter-hierarchy ez-toc-counter ez-toc-grey ez-toc-container-direction\">\n<div class=\"ez-toc-title-container\">\n<p class=\"ez-toc-title\" style=\"cursor:inherit\">Table of Contents<\/p>\n<span class=\"ez-toc-title-toggle\"><a href=\"#\" class=\"ez-toc-pull-right ez-toc-btn ez-toc-btn-xs ez-toc-btn-default ez-toc-toggle\" aria-label=\"Toggle Table of Content\"><span class=\"ez-toc-js-icon-con\"><span class=\"\"><span class=\"eztoc-hide\" style=\"display:none;\">Toggle<\/span><span class=\"ez-toc-icon-toggle-span\"><svg style=\"fill: #999;color:#999\" xmlns=\"http:\/\/www.w3.org\/2000\/svg\" class=\"list-377408\" width=\"20px\" height=\"20px\" viewBox=\"0 0 24 24\" fill=\"none\"><path d=\"M6 6H4v2h2V6zm14 0H8v2h12V6zM4 11h2v2H4v-2zm16 0H8v2h12v-2zM4 16h2v2H4v-2zm16 0H8v2h12v-2z\" fill=\"currentColor\"><\/path><\/svg><svg style=\"fill: #999;color:#999\" class=\"arrow-unsorted-368013\" xmlns=\"http:\/\/www.w3.org\/2000\/svg\" width=\"10px\" height=\"10px\" viewBox=\"0 0 24 24\" version=\"1.2\" baseProfile=\"tiny\"><path d=\"M18.2 9.3l-6.2-6.3-6.2 6.3c-.2.2-.3.4-.3.7s.1.5.3.7c.2.2.4.3.7.3h11c.3 0 .5-.1.7-.3.2-.2.3-.5.3-.7s-.1-.5-.3-.7zM5.8 14.7l6.2 6.3 6.2-6.3c.2-.2.3-.5.3-.7s-.1-.5-.3-.7c-.2-.2-.4-.3-.7-.3h-11c-.3 0-.5.1-.7.3-.2.2-.3.5-.3.7s.1.5.3.7z\"\/><\/svg><\/span><\/span><\/span><\/a><\/span><\/div>\n<nav><ul class='ez-toc-list ez-toc-list-level-1 ' ><li class='ez-toc-page-1 ez-toc-heading-level-2'><a class=\"ez-toc-link ez-toc-heading-1\" href=\"https:\/\/www.youthsportspsychology.com\/youth_sports_psychology_blog\/how-perfectionism-hurts-confidence-in-young-athletes\/#Perfectionism_in_Sports_Hurts_Confidence\" >Perfectionism in Sports Hurts Confidence<\/a><ul class='ez-toc-list-level-3' ><li class='ez-toc-heading-level-3'><a class=\"ez-toc-link ez-toc-heading-2\" href=\"https:\/\/www.youthsportspsychology.com\/youth_sports_psychology_blog\/how-perfectionism-hurts-confidence-in-young-athletes\/#Heres_the_good_news_about_perfectionist_athletes\" >Here&#8217;s the good news about perfectionist athletes:<\/a><\/li><li class='ez-toc-page-1 ez-toc-heading-level-3'><a class=\"ez-toc-link ez-toc-heading-3\" href=\"https:\/\/www.youthsportspsychology.com\/youth_sports_psychology_blog\/how-perfectionism-hurts-confidence-in-young-athletes\/#But_heres_the_bad_news\" >But here&#8217;s the bad news:<\/a><ul class='ez-toc-list-level-4' ><li class='ez-toc-heading-level-4'><a class=\"ez-toc-link ez-toc-heading-4\" href=\"https:\/\/www.youthsportspsychology.com\/youth_sports_psychology_blog\/how-perfectionism-hurts-confidence-in-young-athletes\/#Whats_the_solution\" >What&#8217;s the solution?<\/a><\/li><\/ul><\/li><li class='ez-toc-page-1 ez-toc-heading-level-3'><a class=\"ez-toc-link ez-toc-heading-5\" href=\"https:\/\/www.youthsportspsychology.com\/youth_sports_psychology_blog\/how-perfectionism-hurts-confidence-in-young-athletes\/#Heres_the_process_then\" >Here&#8217;s the process then:<\/a><\/li><li class='ez-toc-page-1 ez-toc-heading-level-3'><a class=\"ez-toc-link ez-toc-heading-6\" href=\"https:\/\/www.youthsportspsychology.com\/youth_sports_psychology_blog\/how-perfectionism-hurts-confidence-in-young-athletes\/#Related_Articles_on_Kids_Mental_Game\" >Related Articles on Kids&#8217; Mental Game:<\/a><\/li><li class='ez-toc-page-1 ez-toc-heading-level-3'><a class=\"ez-toc-link ez-toc-heading-7\" href=\"https:\/\/www.youthsportspsychology.com\/youth_sports_psychology_blog\/how-perfectionism-hurts-confidence-in-young-athletes\/#Improve_Your_Mental_Game_From_Anywhere_In_The_World\" >Improve Your Mental Game From Anywhere In The World<\/a><\/li><\/ul><\/li><\/ul><\/nav><\/div>\n\n\n\n\n<p>For example, <a href=\"https:\/\/www.peaksports.com\/helping-young-athletes-kick-perfectionism\/\">perfectionist athletes<\/a> expect a lot from their performance. Some of their expectations are unrealistic and make them think too much about results. This can lead to self-doubt when they don&#8217;t perform up to these high demands.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p><strong>Perfectionists<\/strong> also have a hard time feeling <strong>confident<\/strong> in both practice and competition. They usually get frustrated with themselves when they don&#8217;t live up to their expectations. In addition, <strong>perfectionists<\/strong> often want approval from others.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>They want to be accepted by fellow teammates, coaches, and friends. And if a teammate or coach give them constructive feedback, their <strong>confidence<\/strong> deflates.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<h3 class=\"wp-block-heading\"><span class=\"ez-toc-section\" id=\"Heres_the_good_news_about_perfectionist_athletes\"><\/span>Here&#8217;s the good news about perfectionist athletes:<span class=\"ez-toc-section-end\"><\/span><\/h3>\n\n\n\n<p>Perfectionists are very <strong>motivated,<\/strong> have a strong work ethic, are <strong>committed<\/strong> to their <strong>goals,<\/strong> and have a desire to learn and <strong>improve.<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>A practice <strong>mindset<\/strong> is usually the <strong>perfectionist&#8217;s<\/strong> strength. In addition, coaches love to work with these types of athletes because they usually work very hard and want to improve.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<h3 class=\"wp-block-heading\"><span class=\"ez-toc-section\" id=\"But_heres_the_bad_news\"><\/span>But here&#8217;s the bad news:<span class=\"ez-toc-section-end\"><\/span><\/h3>\n\n\n\n<p><strong>Perfectionists:<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n<ul class=\"wp-block-list\">\n<li>Lose <strong>confidence<\/strong> quickly when not performing well<\/li>\n\n\n\n<li>Expect to perform without making mistakes<\/li>\n\n\n\n<li>Are highly judgmental about their performance<\/li>\n\n\n\n<li><strong>Focus<\/strong> too much on mistakes<\/li>\n\n\n\n<li>Are always trying to fix their technique, which interferes with trust in competition<\/li>\n<\/ul>\n\n\n\n<h4 class=\"wp-block-heading\"><span class=\"ez-toc-section\" id=\"Whats_the_solution\"><\/span>What&#8217;s the solution?<span class=\"ez-toc-section-end\"><\/span><\/h4>\n\n\n\n<p>The answer is not easy. Many of the young athletes we work with fit into the category of <strong>perfectionists.<\/strong> We understand the challenges, but <strong>perfectionist<\/strong> athletes do not.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>The first step is to help athletes uncover the beliefs that underlie perfectionism (and keep them stuck). It&#8217;s also important to help them understand how <strong>perfectionism<\/strong> might hurt their <strong>confidence.<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>For example, we find that athletes often believe they must be perfect to perform well:<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p><em>&#8220;I should demand high expectations of myself because I work so hard to achieve my goals.&#8221;<\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>OR<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p><em>&#8220;The best way to perform perfectly is to avoid making any mistakes.&#8221;<\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>As you can see, these beliefs do not help athletes perform their best.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<h3 class=\"wp-block-heading\"><span class=\"ez-toc-section\" id=\"Heres_the_process_then\"><\/span>Here&#8217;s the process then:<span class=\"ez-toc-section-end\"><\/span><\/h3>\n\n\n\n<ol class=\"wp-block-list\">\n<li>Help young athletes understand the how perfectionism can be helpful and how it can hurt their performance.<\/li>\n\n\n\n<li>Discuss the beliefs and behaviors that support perfectionism (&#8220;I have to perform perfectly&#8221;).<\/li>\n\n\n\n<li>Help young athletes accept that mistakes are okay.<\/li>\n\n\n\n<li>Teach young athletes how to focus on working hard instead of performing perfectly.<\/li>\n<\/ol>\n\n\n\n<p><strong>Here&#8217;s an example of number 3 above:<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n<p><em>&#8220;If I make a mistake, I will keep playing hard. I won&#8217;t let a few mistakes hurt my confidence.&#8221;<\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>If you enjoy our <strong>mental game<\/strong> tips, please share this article to other sports parents and coaches who might appreciate them.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<hr class=\"wp-block-separator has-alpha-channel-opacity is-style-dots\"\/>\n\n\n\n<h3 class=\"wp-block-heading\" id=\"related-articles-on-hockey-mental-game\"><span class=\"ez-toc-section\" id=\"Related_Articles_on_Kids_Mental_Game\"><\/span>Related Articles on Kids&#8217; Mental Game:<span class=\"ez-toc-section-end\"><\/span><\/h3>\n\n\n\n<ul class=\"wp-block-list\">\n<li><a href=\"https:\/\/www.youthsportspsychology.com\/youth_sports_psychology_blog\/sports-parents-top-dilemma-program\/\"><strong>Helping Young Athletes Kick Perfectionism and Fear of Failure<\/strong><\/a><\/li>\n\n\n\n<li><a href=\"https:\/\/www.youthsportspsychology.com\/youth_sports_psychology_blog\/helping-kids-see-the-good-and-bad-of-perfectionism-in-sports\/\"><strong>Helping Kids See the Good and Bad of Perfectionism in Sports<\/strong><\/a><\/li>\n\n\n\n<li><a href=\"https:\/\/www.youthsportspsychology.com\/youth_sports_psychology_blog\/how-to-free-sports-kids-from-the-bonds-of-perfectionism\/\"><strong>How To Free Sports Kids From The Bonds of Perfectionism<\/strong><\/a><\/li>\n<\/ul>\n\n\n\n<p id=\"block-f49818fa-7c7a-4ee3-b5ee-66581aad2c71\">*Subscribe to\u00a0<a href=\"https:\/\/podcasts.apple.com\/us\/podcast\/sports-psychology-podcast-by-peaksports-com\/id152566009\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noreferrer noopener\"><strong>The Sports Psychology Podcast<\/strong><\/a>\u00a0on iTunes<br>*Subscribe to <strong><a href=\"https:\/\/open.spotify.com\/show\/0ynyaalKxbnNmsoeL8gF5X?si=8224669de9b3435b\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noreferrer noopener\">The Sports Psychology Podcast<\/a> <\/strong>on Spotify<\/p>\n\n\n\n<hr class=\"wp-block-separator has-css-opacity is-style-dots\"\/>\n\n\n\n<h3 class=\"wp-block-heading\"><span class=\"ez-toc-section\" id=\"Improve_Your_Mental_Game_From_Anywhere_In_The_World\"><\/span><strong>Improve Your Mental Game From Anywhere In The World<\/strong><span class=\"ez-toc-section-end\"><\/span><\/h3>\n\n\n<div class=\"wp-block-image\">\n<figure class=\"alignright is-resized\"><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" width=\"150\" height=\"150\" src=\"https:\/\/www.youthsportspsychology.com\/youth_sports_psychology_blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/11\/mental-training-for-young-athletes.png\" alt=\"\" class=\"wp-image-6868\" style=\"width:138px;height:auto\"\/><\/figure>\n<\/div>\n\n\n<p>We\u2019re certain that, as a parent,&nbsp;you want to help your child develop confidence and discipline in sports and life.&nbsp;And as a sports parent, you\u2019d love for your children to reach their potential in sports.&nbsp;But encouraging your child to <strong>strive for greatness without pressuring them<\/strong> can be a challenge.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>You can get expert mental coaching with us from anywhere. Meet with us via Zoom, Skype, FaceTime or phone call. With today\u2019s video technology, we are able to connect with athletes and coaches all over the globe.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"has-text-align-center\"><strong>Call Us Today to Schedule Your Free 15-Minute Session.<\/strong><br><strong>Find Out How Your Athlete Can Benefit From One-on-One Mental Coaching!<\/strong><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>Perfectionism in Sports Hurts Confidence For example, perfectionist athletes expect a lot from their performance. Some of their expectations are unrealistic and make them think too much about results. This can lead to self-doubt when they don&#8217;t perform up to these high demands. Perfectionists also have a hard time feeling &#8230; <a title=\"How Perfectionism Hurts Confidence in Young Athletes\" class=\"read-more\" href=\"https:\/\/www.youthsportspsychology.com\/youth_sports_psychology_blog\/how-perfectionism-hurts-confidence-in-young-athletes\/\" aria-label=\"Read more about How Perfectionism Hurts Confidence in Young Athletes\">Read Sport Psychology Tip<\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":3413,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[6],"tags":[39,527,317],"class_list":["post-1919","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-youth-sports-psychology-blog","tag-kids-sports-psychology","tag-perfectionism-in-youth-sports","tag-young-athlete-confidence","resize-featured-image"],"aioseo_notices":[],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.youthsportspsychology.com\/youth_sports_psychology_blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1919","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.youthsportspsychology.com\/youth_sports_psychology_blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.youthsportspsychology.com\/youth_sports_psychology_blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.youthsportspsychology.com\/youth_sports_psychology_blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.youthsportspsychology.com\/youth_sports_psychology_blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=1919"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/www.youthsportspsychology.com\/youth_sports_psychology_blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1919\/revisions"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.youthsportspsychology.com\/youth_sports_psychology_blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/3413"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.youthsportspsychology.com\/youth_sports_psychology_blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=1919"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.youthsportspsychology.com\/youth_sports_psychology_blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=1919"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.youthsportspsychology.com\/youth_sports_psychology_blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=1919"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}