{"id":4741,"date":"2017-09-21T17:43:07","date_gmt":"2017-09-21T17:43:07","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.youthsportspsychology.com\/youth_sports_psychology_blog\/?p=4741"},"modified":"2025-07-10T07:54:00","modified_gmt":"2025-07-10T11:54:00","slug":"the-challenges-with-being-your-kids-coach-and-parent","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.youthsportspsychology.com\/youth_sports_psychology_blog\/the-challenges-with-being-your-kids-coach-and-parent\/","title":{"rendered":"The Challenges with Being Your Kid&#8217;s Coach and Parent"},"content":{"rendered":"\n<h2 class=\"wp-block-heading has-text-align-center\"><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-4743\" src=\"https:\/\/www.youthsportspsychology.com\/youth_sports_psychology_blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2017\/09\/the-challenges-with-being-your-kids-coach-and-parent-1.jpg\" alt=\"Coaching-Your-Young-Athlete\" width=\"600\" height=\"300\" srcset=\"https:\/\/www.youthsportspsychology.com\/youth_sports_psychology_blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2017\/09\/the-challenges-with-being-your-kids-coach-and-parent-1.jpg 600w, https:\/\/www.youthsportspsychology.com\/youth_sports_psychology_blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2017\/09\/the-challenges-with-being-your-kids-coach-and-parent-1-300x150.jpg 300w\" sizes=\"auto, (max-width: 600px) 100vw, 600px\" \/><\/h2>\n\n\n\n<h2 class=\"wp-block-heading has-text-align-center\"><span class=\"ez-toc-section\" id=\"Setting_Team_Goals_as_a_Parent-Coach\"><\/span>Setting Team Goals as a Parent-Coach<span class=\"ez-toc-section-end\"><\/span><\/h2><div id=\"ez-toc-container\" class=\"ez-toc-v2_0_84 ez-toc-wrap-center counter-hierarchy ez-toc-counter ez-toc-grey ez-toc-container-direction\">\n<div class=\"ez-toc-title-container\">\n<p class=\"ez-toc-title\" style=\"cursor:inherit\">Table of Contents<\/p>\n<span class=\"ez-toc-title-toggle\"><a href=\"#\" class=\"ez-toc-pull-right ez-toc-btn ez-toc-btn-xs ez-toc-btn-default ez-toc-toggle\" aria-label=\"Toggle Table of Content\"><span class=\"ez-toc-js-icon-con\"><span class=\"\"><span class=\"eztoc-hide\" style=\"display:none;\">Toggle<\/span><span class=\"ez-toc-icon-toggle-span\"><svg style=\"fill: #999;color:#999\" xmlns=\"http:\/\/www.w3.org\/2000\/svg\" class=\"list-377408\" width=\"20px\" height=\"20px\" viewBox=\"0 0 24 24\" fill=\"none\"><path d=\"M6 6H4v2h2V6zm14 0H8v2h12V6zM4 11h2v2H4v-2zm16 0H8v2h12v-2zM4 16h2v2H4v-2zm16 0H8v2h12v-2z\" fill=\"currentColor\"><\/path><\/svg><svg style=\"fill: #999;color:#999\" class=\"arrow-unsorted-368013\" xmlns=\"http:\/\/www.w3.org\/2000\/svg\" width=\"10px\" height=\"10px\" viewBox=\"0 0 24 24\" version=\"1.2\" baseProfile=\"tiny\"><path d=\"M18.2 9.3l-6.2-6.3-6.2 6.3c-.2.2-.3.4-.3.7s.1.5.3.7c.2.2.4.3.7.3h11c.3 0 .5-.1.7-.3.2-.2.3-.5.3-.7s-.1-.5-.3-.7zM5.8 14.7l6.2 6.3 6.2-6.3c.2-.2.3-.5.3-.7s-.1-.5-.3-.7c-.2-.2-.4-.3-.7-.3h-11c-.3 0-.5.1-.7.3-.2.2-.3.5-.3.7s.1.5.3.7z\"\/><\/svg><\/span><\/span><\/span><\/a><\/span><\/div>\n<nav><ul class='ez-toc-list ez-toc-list-level-1 ' ><li class='ez-toc-page-1 ez-toc-heading-level-2'><a class=\"ez-toc-link ez-toc-heading-1\" href=\"https:\/\/www.youthsportspsychology.com\/youth_sports_psychology_blog\/the-challenges-with-being-your-kids-coach-and-parent\/#Setting_Team_Goals_as_a_Parent-Coach\" >Setting Team Goals as a Parent-Coach<\/a><ul class='ez-toc-list-level-4' ><li class='ez-toc-heading-level-4'><ul class='ez-toc-list-level-4' ><li class='ez-toc-heading-level-4'><a class=\"ez-toc-link ez-toc-heading-2\" href=\"https:\/\/www.youthsportspsychology.com\/youth_sports_psychology_blog\/the-challenges-with-being-your-kids-coach-and-parent\/#The_first_issue_you_need_to_tackle_is_the_expectation_that_youll_favor_your_child\" >The first issue you need to tackle is the expectation that you\u2019ll favor your child.<\/a><\/li><li class='ez-toc-page-1 ez-toc-heading-level-4'><a class=\"ez-toc-link ez-toc-heading-3\" href=\"https:\/\/www.youthsportspsychology.com\/youth_sports_psychology_blog\/the-challenges-with-being-your-kids-coach-and-parent\/#You_can_take_steps_to_stop_these_issues_before_they_ever_begin%E2%80%A6\" >You can take steps to stop these issues before they ever begin&#8230;<\/a><\/li><\/ul><\/li><li class='ez-toc-page-1 ez-toc-heading-level-3'><a class=\"ez-toc-link ez-toc-heading-4\" href=\"https:\/\/www.youthsportspsychology.com\/youth_sports_psychology_blog\/the-challenges-with-being-your-kids-coach-and-parent\/#Related_Articles_on_Youth_Sports\" >Related Articles on Youth Sports:<\/a><\/li><li class='ez-toc-page-1 ez-toc-heading-level-3'><a class=\"ez-toc-link ez-toc-heading-5\" href=\"https:\/\/www.youthsportspsychology.com\/youth_sports_psychology_blog\/the-challenges-with-being-your-kids-coach-and-parent\/#Help_Young_Athletes_Boost_Confidence_in_Sports\" >Help Young Athletes Boost Confidence in Sports!<\/a><\/li><\/ul><\/li><\/ul><\/nav><\/div>\n\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">A sports parent asks:<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\"><em>&#8220;As a parent and a coach, how should I handle performing both duties simultaneously to help all the kids as much as possible?&#8221;<\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Being a coach and parent can breed many issues that you need to be aware of from day one&#8230;<\/p>\n\n\n\n<h4 class=\"wp-block-heading\"><span class=\"ez-toc-section\" id=\"The_first_issue_you_need_to_tackle_is_the_expectation_that_youll_favor_your_child\"><\/span>The first issue you need to tackle is the expectation that you\u2019ll favor your child.<span class=\"ez-toc-section-end\"><\/span><\/h4>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">If the other players or coaches expect or suspect <strong>favoritism,<\/strong> your players\u2019 self-confidence will drop\u2014and so will their parents\u2019 trust in you.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">The players will likely assume you\u2019ll favor your own kids, unless you prove otherwise. Again, that can lead to a <strong>loss in confidence<\/strong> and with this, kids\u2019 performance will deteriorate.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">They may start <strong>second-guessing<\/strong> themselves and soon could start struggling with a number of <strong>mental game issues,<\/strong> among them comparing themselves to others and worrying about what others think of them.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<h4 class=\"wp-block-heading\"><span class=\"ez-toc-section\" id=\"You_can_take_steps_to_stop_these_issues_before_they_ever_begin%E2%80%A6\"><\/span>You can take steps to stop these issues before they ever begin&#8230;<span class=\"ez-toc-section-end\"><\/span><\/h4>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">First, get everyone involved by having a team meeting with the purpose of establishing an inclusive team culture. Make sure all the parents are involved.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Set <strong>goals<\/strong> for the kids, and for the team. You want to build everyone&#8217;s <strong>confidence,<\/strong> not just your kids\u2019, but the other players\u2019 and their parents\u2019 <strong>confidence,<\/strong> as well. Make sure your goals <strong>focus<\/strong> on ways the team can grow together and <strong>build confidence<\/strong> together.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">During practices and games, remind kids not to compare themselves to others.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">It\u2019s possible kids will compare themselves to your kids in an effort to gain your favor. Tell them to focus on their own strengths, and not on the strengths of others.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">You might even ask them to list their strengths and best moments in sports. In addition, tell them to <strong>focus<\/strong> on playing for themselves\u2014not to please other people, including their coaches.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">To be a good sports parent, let your children know that you can\u2019t give them special attention during team practice, but will instead work with them to meet their goals, just like you\u2019ll work with the other players.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Share your <strong>team goals<\/strong> with your children to make them feel included. Keeping a solid balance can be difficult, but it\u2019s achievable.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<hr class=\"wp-block-separator has-alpha-channel-opacity is-style-dots\"\/>\n\n\n\n<h3 class=\"wp-block-heading\" id=\"related-articles-on-hockey-mental-game\"><span class=\"ez-toc-section\" id=\"Related_Articles_on_Youth_Sports\"><\/span>Related Articles on Youth Sports:<span class=\"ez-toc-section-end\"><\/span><\/h3>\n\n\n\n<ul class=\"wp-block-list\">\n<li><a href=\"https:\/\/www.youthsportspsychology.com\/youth_sports_psychology_blog\/how-parents-emotions-affect-sports-kids\/\"><strong>How Parents\u2019 Emotions Affect Sports Kids<\/strong><\/a><\/li>\n\n\n\n<li><a href=\"https:\/\/www.youthsportspsychology.com\/youth_sports_psychology_blog\/the-psychology-of-sports-injury-and-helping-young-athletes-cope\/\"><strong>The Psychology of Sports Injury and Helping Athletes Cope<\/strong><\/a><\/li>\n\n\n\n<li><a href=\"https:\/\/www.youthsportspsychology.com\/youth_sports_psychology_blog\/dealing-with-coaches-who-humiliate-sports-kids\/\"><strong>Dealing With Coaches Who Humiliate Sports Kids<\/strong><\/a><\/li>\n<\/ul>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\" id=\"block-f49818fa-7c7a-4ee3-b5ee-66581aad2c71\">*Subscribe to\u00a0<a href=\"https:\/\/podcasts.apple.com\/us\/podcast\/sports-psychology-podcast-by-peaksports-com\/id152566009\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noreferrer noopener\"><strong>The Sports Psychology Podcast<\/strong><\/a>\u00a0on iTunes<\/p>\n\n\n\n<hr class=\"wp-block-separator has-alpha-channel-opacity is-style-dots\"\/>\n\n\n\n<h3 class=\"wp-block-heading\"><span class=\"ez-toc-section\" id=\"Help_Young_Athletes_Boost_Confidence_in_Sports\"><\/span>Help Young Athletes Boost Confidence in Sports!<span class=\"ez-toc-section-end\"><\/span><\/h3>\n\n\n<div class=\"wp-block-image\">\n<figure class=\"alignright size-full is-resized\"><a href=\"https:\/\/www.youthsportspsychology.com\/youth_sports_psychology_blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2018\/10\/ultimate-sports-parent-small.jpg\"><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" width=\"225\" height=\"250\" src=\"https:\/\/www.youthsportspsychology.com\/youth_sports_psychology_blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2018\/10\/ultimate-sports-parent-small.jpg\" alt=\"The Ultimate Sports Parent\" class=\"wp-image-11157\" style=\"width:167px;height:auto\"\/><\/a><\/figure>\n<\/div>\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Every day, we receive letters from parents like you who want their children and teens to excel in sports. However, these parents can <strong>see fear, doubt, and frustration on the faces of their kids<\/strong> who struggle with the \u201cinner\u201d game of sports. But these parents have no idea how to help their kids <strong>overcome the worries, expectations and self-defeating thoughts<\/strong> that prevent their young athletes from feeling confident and successful.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">You can benefit from our 1<strong>5-plus years\u2019 of work in sports psychology and sports parenting research<\/strong>. Now, you can <strong>tap into our secrets to sports success<\/strong> through a cutting-edge, 14-day program that helps young athletes overcome the top \u201cmental game\u201d challenges that sports parents face\u2014and the top <strong>challenges young athletes face<\/strong>.<\/p>\n\n\n<div class=\"gb-container gb-container-fbab03ed\">\n\n<a class=\"gb-button gb-button-fa7bf2e7 gb-button-text\" href=\"https:\/\/www.peaksports.com\/ultimate-sports-parent-workbook-cd-program\/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener noreferrer\">GET DETAILS<\/a>\n\n\n\n<a class=\"gb-button gb-button-33bcee1d gb-button-text\" href=\"https:\/\/shop.peaksports.com\/products\/the-ultimate-sports-parent-digital\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener noreferrer\">BUY NOW<\/a>\n\n<\/div>","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>Setting Team Goals as a Parent-Coach A sports parent asks: &#8220;As a parent and a coach, how should I handle performing both duties simultaneously to help all the kids as much as possible?&#8221; Being a coach and parent can breed many issues that you need to be aware of from &#8230; <a title=\"The Challenges with Being Your Kid&#8217;s Coach and Parent\" class=\"read-more\" href=\"https:\/\/www.youthsportspsychology.com\/youth_sports_psychology_blog\/the-challenges-with-being-your-kids-coach-and-parent\/\" aria-label=\"Read more about The Challenges with Being Your Kid&#8217;s Coach and Parent\">Read Sport Psychology Tip<\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":4744,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_monsterinsights_skip_tracking":false,"_monsterinsights_sitenote_active":false,"_monsterinsights_sitenote_note":"","_monsterinsights_sitenote_category":0,"footnotes":""},"categories":[17,292,25,6],"tags":[619,615],"class_list":["post-4741","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-sports-parenting","category-sports-parents-success-tips","category-youth-sports-coach","category-youth-sports-psychology-blog","tag-coaching-youth-sports","tag-goal-setting-in-youth-sports"],"aioseo_notices":[],"aioseo_head":"\n\t\t<!-- All in One SEO Pro 4.9.7.2 - aioseo.com -->\n\t<meta name=\"description\" content=\"Being a coach and parent can breed many issues that you need to be aware of from day one. 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