{"id":4814,"date":"2018-01-05T14:14:07","date_gmt":"2018-01-05T14:14:07","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.youthsportspsychology.com\/youth_sports_psychology_blog\/?p=4814"},"modified":"2025-07-10T07:25:00","modified_gmt":"2025-07-10T11:25:00","slug":"how-to-help-kids-that-want-to-quit-sports","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.youthsportspsychology.com\/youth_sports_psychology_blog\/how-to-help-kids-that-want-to-quit-sports\/","title":{"rendered":"How to Help Kids That Want to Quit Sports"},"content":{"rendered":"\n<h2 class=\"wp-block-heading has-text-align-center\"><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-4816\" src=\"https:\/\/www.youthsportspsychology.com\/youth_sports_psychology_blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2018\/01\/how-to-help-kids-that-want-to-quit-sports-1.jpg\" alt=\"How to Help Kids That Want to Quit Sports\" width=\"600\" height=\"300\" srcset=\"https:\/\/www.youthsportspsychology.com\/youth_sports_psychology_blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2018\/01\/how-to-help-kids-that-want-to-quit-sports-1.jpg 600w, https:\/\/www.youthsportspsychology.com\/youth_sports_psychology_blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2018\/01\/how-to-help-kids-that-want-to-quit-sports-1-300x150.jpg 300w\" sizes=\"auto, (max-width: 600px) 100vw, 600px\" \/><\/h2>\n\n\n\n<h2 class=\"wp-block-heading has-text-align-center\"><span class=\"ez-toc-section\" id=\"Helping_Kids_Focus_on_The_Process_Instead_of_Outcome\"><\/span>Helping Kids Focus on The Process Instead of Outcome<span class=\"ez-toc-section-end\"><\/span><\/h2><div id=\"ez-toc-container\" class=\"ez-toc-v2_0_82_2 ez-toc-wrap-center counter-hierarchy ez-toc-counter ez-toc-grey ez-toc-container-direction\">\n<div class=\"ez-toc-title-container\">\n<p class=\"ez-toc-title\" style=\"cursor:inherit\">Table of Contents<\/p>\n<span class=\"ez-toc-title-toggle\"><a href=\"#\" class=\"ez-toc-pull-right ez-toc-btn ez-toc-btn-xs ez-toc-btn-default ez-toc-toggle\" aria-label=\"Toggle Table of Content\"><span class=\"ez-toc-js-icon-con\"><span class=\"\"><span class=\"eztoc-hide\" style=\"display:none;\">Toggle<\/span><span class=\"ez-toc-icon-toggle-span\"><svg style=\"fill: #999;color:#999\" xmlns=\"http:\/\/www.w3.org\/2000\/svg\" class=\"list-377408\" width=\"20px\" height=\"20px\" viewBox=\"0 0 24 24\" fill=\"none\"><path d=\"M6 6H4v2h2V6zm14 0H8v2h12V6zM4 11h2v2H4v-2zm16 0H8v2h12v-2zM4 16h2v2H4v-2zm16 0H8v2h12v-2z\" fill=\"currentColor\"><\/path><\/svg><svg style=\"fill: #999;color:#999\" class=\"arrow-unsorted-368013\" xmlns=\"http:\/\/www.w3.org\/2000\/svg\" width=\"10px\" height=\"10px\" viewBox=\"0 0 24 24\" version=\"1.2\" baseProfile=\"tiny\"><path d=\"M18.2 9.3l-6.2-6.3-6.2 6.3c-.2.2-.3.4-.3.7s.1.5.3.7c.2.2.4.3.7.3h11c.3 0 .5-.1.7-.3.2-.2.3-.5.3-.7s-.1-.5-.3-.7zM5.8 14.7l6.2 6.3 6.2-6.3c.2-.2.3-.5.3-.7s-.1-.5-.3-.7c-.2-.2-.4-.3-.7-.3h-11c-.3 0-.5.1-.7.3-.2.2-.3.5-.3.7s.1.5.3.7z\"\/><\/svg><\/span><\/span><\/span><\/a><\/span><\/div>\n<nav><ul class='ez-toc-list ez-toc-list-level-1 ' ><li class='ez-toc-page-1 ez-toc-heading-level-2'><a class=\"ez-toc-link ez-toc-heading-1\" href=\"https:\/\/www.youthsportspsychology.com\/youth_sports_psychology_blog\/how-to-help-kids-that-want-to-quit-sports\/#Helping_Kids_Focus_on_The_Process_Instead_of_Outcome\" >Helping Kids Focus on The Process Instead of Outcome<\/a><ul class='ez-toc-list-level-4' ><li class='ez-toc-heading-level-4'><ul class='ez-toc-list-level-4' ><li class='ez-toc-heading-level-4'><a class=\"ez-toc-link ez-toc-heading-2\" href=\"https:\/\/www.youthsportspsychology.com\/youth_sports_psychology_blog\/how-to-help-kids-that-want-to-quit-sports\/#Perfectionists_tend_to_be_their_own_worst_enemies\" >Perfectionists tend to be their own worst enemies.<\/a><\/li><li class='ez-toc-page-1 ez-toc-heading-level-4'><a class=\"ez-toc-link ez-toc-heading-3\" href=\"https:\/\/www.youthsportspsychology.com\/youth_sports_psychology_blog\/how-to-help-kids-that-want-to-quit-sports\/#Help_kids_try_to_identify_and_replace_these_thoughts_with_smaller_mot_manageable_goals_or_objectives\" >Help kids try to identify and replace these thoughts with smaller, mot manageable goals or objectives.<\/a><\/li><\/ul><\/li><li class='ez-toc-page-1 ez-toc-heading-level-3'><a class=\"ez-toc-link ez-toc-heading-4\" href=\"https:\/\/www.youthsportspsychology.com\/youth_sports_psychology_blog\/how-to-help-kids-that-want-to-quit-sports\/#Related_Articles_on_Kids_Mental_Game\" >Related Articles on Kids&#8217; Mental Game:<\/a><\/li><li class='ez-toc-page-1 ez-toc-heading-level-3'><a class=\"ez-toc-link ez-toc-heading-5\" href=\"https:\/\/www.youthsportspsychology.com\/youth_sports_psychology_blog\/how-to-help-kids-that-want-to-quit-sports\/#Improve_Your_Mental_Game_From_Anywhere_In_The_World\" >Improve Your Mental Game From Anywhere In The World<\/a><\/li><\/ul><\/li><\/ul><\/nav><\/div>\n\n\n\n\n<p><strong>A young athlete writes:<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n<p><em>&#8220;I want to quit wrestling because I have too much anxiety with the pain and my failure. I have found other hobbies like lifting by myself or with a friend. I just don&#8217;t like wrestling and I don&#8217;t know how to tell my coach that wrestling is just not for me.&#8221;<\/em><br><strong>~Christopher<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>Christopher is by no means alone! <strong>Fear of failure<\/strong> is one of the most common issues for sports kids, and it can sometimes create so much <strong>frustration<\/strong> that kids drop out, like Christopher.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>To avoid having your sports kids drop out, it\u2019s important to understand and address <strong>fear of failure<\/strong> and <strong>perfectionism.<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>Perfectionists are most likely to struggle with fear of failure.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>While <strong>perfectionists<\/strong> work hard and practice constantly, often improving more quickly then others because of their work ethic, perfectionism has a dark side&#8230;<\/p>\n\n\n\n<h4 class=\"wp-block-heading\"><span class=\"ez-toc-section\" id=\"Perfectionists_tend_to_be_their_own_worst_enemies\"><\/span>Perfectionists tend to be their own worst enemies.<span class=\"ez-toc-section-end\"><\/span><\/h4>\n\n\n\n<p>They pressure themselves so much during competition that they undermine their own performance.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p><strong>Perfectionists<\/strong> expect a lot of themselves, and when they do not perform up to those expectations, their <strong>confidence<\/strong> can be crushed.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>Often <strong>perfectionists<\/strong> are known as &#8220;practice players,&#8221; players who will beat anyone during practice but will fail to perform when they\u2019re in front of the bright lights of the real game.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>Kids who grapple with <strong>perfectionism<\/strong> and <strong>fear of failure<\/strong> have all kinds of <strong>fears<\/strong> during game time.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>They\u2019re afraid that their coaches and teammates will criticize their performance, that they will let others down, and that they will not live up to their lofty expectations.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>They <strong>focus<\/strong> on the results of the game rather then the game itself.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>All of this takes kids&#8217; heads out of the game. It can become so gut-wrenching that these athletes simply want to quit.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>Young athletes should <strong>focus<\/strong> on the here-and-now during games, rather than thinking about mistakes, points, or what anyone else thinks of them.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>The first thing you can do to help your sports children is identify the beliefs and expectations that are causing them so much frustration and pain.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>Are they too focused on the end result of the game? Are they too worried about what their coaches and friends may think of them? Do they feel like they need to be the star of the team? Do they feel like a failure if they are not perfect?<\/p>\n\n\n\n<h4 class=\"wp-block-heading\"><span class=\"ez-toc-section\" id=\"Help_kids_try_to_identify_and_replace_these_thoughts_with_smaller_mot_manageable_goals_or_objectives\"><\/span>Help kids try to identify and replace these thoughts with smaller, mot manageable goals or objectives.<span class=\"ez-toc-section-end\"><\/span><\/h4>\n\n\n\n<p>For example, instead of having a goal of scoring 30 points in basketball, have them try to <strong>concentrate<\/strong> on being decisive when shooting and keeping their eyes on the basket when they release their shot.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>By <strong>focusing<\/strong> on the process instead of the outcome, your sports kids will be able to <strong>concentrate<\/strong> on the game, rather than on their worries.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<hr class=\"wp-block-separator has-alpha-channel-opacity is-style-dots\"\/>\n\n\n\n<h3 class=\"wp-block-heading\" id=\"related-articles-on-hockey-mental-game\"><span class=\"ez-toc-section\" id=\"Related_Articles_on_Kids_Mental_Game\"><\/span>Related Articles on Kids&#8217; Mental Game:<span class=\"ez-toc-section-end\"><\/span><\/h3>\n\n\n\n<ul class=\"wp-block-list\">\n<li><a href=\"https:\/\/www.youthsportspsychology.com\/youth_sports_psychology_blog\/parents-have-your-kids-wanted-to-quit-sports\/\"><strong>Parents, Have Your Kids Wanted to Quit Sports?<\/strong><\/a><\/li>\n\n\n\n<li><a href=\"https:\/\/www.youthsportspsychology.com\/youth_sports_psychology_blog\/what-to-do-when-sports-kids-want-to-quit\/\"><strong>What to Do When Sports Kids Want to Quit<\/strong><\/a><\/li>\n\n\n\n<li><a href=\"https:\/\/www.youthsportspsychology.com\/youth_sports_psychology_blog\/how-to-keep-kids-in-sports\/\"><strong>How to Keep Kids in Sports<\/strong><\/a><\/li>\n<\/ul>\n\n\n\n<p id=\"block-f49818fa-7c7a-4ee3-b5ee-66581aad2c71\">*Subscribe to\u00a0<a href=\"https:\/\/podcasts.apple.com\/us\/podcast\/sports-psychology-podcast-by-peaksports-com\/id152566009\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noreferrer noopener\"><strong>The Sports Psychology Podcast<\/strong><\/a>\u00a0on iTunes<br>*Subscribe to <a href=\"https:\/\/open.spotify.com\/show\/0ynyaalKxbnNmsoeL8gF5X?si=8224669de9b3435b\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noreferrer noopener\"><strong>The Sports Psychology Podcast<\/strong><\/a> on Spotify<\/p>\n\n\n\n<hr class=\"wp-block-separator has-css-opacity is-style-dots\"\/>\n\n\n\n<h3 class=\"wp-block-heading\"><span class=\"ez-toc-section\" id=\"Improve_Your_Mental_Game_From_Anywhere_In_The_World\"><\/span><strong>Improve Your Mental Game From Anywhere In The World<\/strong><span class=\"ez-toc-section-end\"><\/span><\/h3>\n\n\n<div class=\"wp-block-image\">\n<figure class=\"alignright is-resized\"><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" width=\"150\" height=\"150\" src=\"https:\/\/www.youthsportspsychology.com\/youth_sports_psychology_blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/11\/mental-training-for-young-athletes.png\" alt=\"\" class=\"wp-image-6868\" style=\"width:138px;height:auto\"\/><\/figure>\n<\/div>\n\n\n<p>We\u2019re certain that, as a parent,&nbsp;you want to help your child develop confidence and discipline in sports and life.&nbsp;And as a sports parent, you\u2019d love for your children to reach their potential in sports.&nbsp;But encouraging your child to <strong>strive for greatness without pressuring them<\/strong> can be a challenge.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>You can get expert mental coaching with us from anywhere. Meet with us via Zoom, Skype, FaceTime or phone call. With today\u2019s video technology, we are able to connect with athletes and coaches all over the globe.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"has-text-align-center\"><strong>Call Us Today to Schedule Your Free 15-Minute Session.<\/strong><br><strong>Find Out How Your Athlete Can Benefit From One-on-One Mental Coaching!<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n<p><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>Helping Kids Focus on The Process Instead of Outcome A young athlete writes: &#8220;I want to quit wrestling because I have too much anxiety with the pain and my failure. I have found other hobbies like lifting by myself or with a friend. I just don&#8217;t like wrestling and I &#8230; <a title=\"How to Help Kids That Want to Quit Sports\" class=\"read-more\" href=\"https:\/\/www.youthsportspsychology.com\/youth_sports_psychology_blog\/how-to-help-kids-that-want-to-quit-sports\/\" aria-label=\"Read more about How to Help Kids That Want to Quit Sports\">Read Sport Psychology Tip<\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":4819,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[28,27,35,6],"tags":[298,281],"class_list":["post-4814","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-perfectionism-in-sports","category-perfectionism-is-young-athletes","category-pressure-from-parents","category-youth-sports-psychology-blog","tag-fear-of-failure-in-sports","tag-perfectionism-in-young-athletes"],"aioseo_notices":[],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.youthsportspsychology.com\/youth_sports_psychology_blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/4814","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.youthsportspsychology.com\/youth_sports_psychology_blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.youthsportspsychology.com\/youth_sports_psychology_blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.youthsportspsychology.com\/youth_sports_psychology_blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.youthsportspsychology.com\/youth_sports_psychology_blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=4814"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/www.youthsportspsychology.com\/youth_sports_psychology_blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/4814\/revisions"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.youthsportspsychology.com\/youth_sports_psychology_blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/4819"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.youthsportspsychology.com\/youth_sports_psychology_blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=4814"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.youthsportspsychology.com\/youth_sports_psychology_blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=4814"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.youthsportspsychology.com\/youth_sports_psychology_blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=4814"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}