{"id":5218,"date":"2019-05-02T18:45:49","date_gmt":"2019-05-02T18:45:49","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/www.youthsportspsychology.com\/youth_sports_psychology_blog\/?p=5218"},"modified":"2025-07-10T05:28:08","modified_gmt":"2025-07-10T09:28:08","slug":"how-to-avoid-comparison-trap-for-sports-parents","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.youthsportspsychology.com\/youth_sports_psychology_blog\/how-to-avoid-comparison-trap-for-sports-parents\/","title":{"rendered":"How to Avoid Comparison Trap for Sports Parents"},"content":{"rendered":"<div class=\"wp-block-image\">\n<figure class=\"aligncenter\"><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" width=\"600\" height=\"300\" src=\"https:\/\/www.youthsportspsychology.com\/youth_sports_psychology_blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/05\/how-to-avoid-comparison-trap-for-sports-parents.jpg\" alt=\"\" class=\"wp-image-5223\" srcset=\"https:\/\/www.youthsportspsychology.com\/youth_sports_psychology_blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/05\/how-to-avoid-comparison-trap-for-sports-parents.jpg 600w, https:\/\/www.youthsportspsychology.com\/youth_sports_psychology_blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/05\/how-to-avoid-comparison-trap-for-sports-parents-300x150.jpg 300w\" sizes=\"auto, (max-width: 600px) 100vw, 600px\" \/><\/figure>\n<\/div>\n\n\n<h2 class=\"wp-block-heading has-text-align-center\"><span class=\"ez-toc-section\" id=\"Comparisons_Hurt_Athletes_Confidence\"><\/span> Comparisons Hurt Athletes\u2019 Confidence <span class=\"ez-toc-section-end\"><\/span><\/h2><div id=\"ez-toc-container\" class=\"ez-toc-v2_0_82_2 ez-toc-wrap-center counter-hierarchy ez-toc-counter ez-toc-grey ez-toc-container-direction\">\n<div class=\"ez-toc-title-container\">\n<p class=\"ez-toc-title\" style=\"cursor:inherit\">Table of Contents<\/p>\n<span class=\"ez-toc-title-toggle\"><a href=\"#\" class=\"ez-toc-pull-right ez-toc-btn ez-toc-btn-xs ez-toc-btn-default ez-toc-toggle\" aria-label=\"Toggle Table of Content\"><span class=\"ez-toc-js-icon-con\"><span class=\"\"><span class=\"eztoc-hide\" style=\"display:none;\">Toggle<\/span><span class=\"ez-toc-icon-toggle-span\"><svg style=\"fill: #999;color:#999\" xmlns=\"http:\/\/www.w3.org\/2000\/svg\" class=\"list-377408\" width=\"20px\" height=\"20px\" viewBox=\"0 0 24 24\" fill=\"none\"><path d=\"M6 6H4v2h2V6zm14 0H8v2h12V6zM4 11h2v2H4v-2zm16 0H8v2h12v-2zM4 16h2v2H4v-2zm16 0H8v2h12v-2z\" fill=\"currentColor\"><\/path><\/svg><svg style=\"fill: #999;color:#999\" class=\"arrow-unsorted-368013\" xmlns=\"http:\/\/www.w3.org\/2000\/svg\" width=\"10px\" height=\"10px\" viewBox=\"0 0 24 24\" version=\"1.2\" baseProfile=\"tiny\"><path d=\"M18.2 9.3l-6.2-6.3-6.2 6.3c-.2.2-.3.4-.3.7s.1.5.3.7c.2.2.4.3.7.3h11c.3 0 .5-.1.7-.3.2-.2.3-.5.3-.7s-.1-.5-.3-.7zM5.8 14.7l6.2 6.3 6.2-6.3c.2-.2.3-.5.3-.7s-.1-.5-.3-.7c-.2-.2-.4-.3-.7-.3h-11c-.3 0-.5.1-.7.3-.2.2-.3.5-.3.7s.1.5.3.7z\"\/><\/svg><\/span><\/span><\/span><\/a><\/span><\/div>\n<nav><ul class='ez-toc-list ez-toc-list-level-1 ' ><li class='ez-toc-page-1 ez-toc-heading-level-2'><a class=\"ez-toc-link ez-toc-heading-1\" href=\"https:\/\/www.youthsportspsychology.com\/youth_sports_psychology_blog\/how-to-avoid-comparison-trap-for-sports-parents\/#Comparisons_Hurt_Athletes_Confidence\" >Comparisons Hurt Athletes\u2019 Confidence<\/a><ul class='ez-toc-list-level-3' ><li class='ez-toc-heading-level-3'><a class=\"ez-toc-link ez-toc-heading-2\" href=\"https:\/\/www.youthsportspsychology.com\/youth_sports_psychology_blog\/how-to-avoid-comparison-trap-for-sports-parents\/#Avoid_Comparison\" >Avoid Comparison<\/a><\/li><li class='ez-toc-page-1 ez-toc-heading-level-3'><a class=\"ez-toc-link ez-toc-heading-3\" href=\"https:\/\/www.youthsportspsychology.com\/youth_sports_psychology_blog\/how-to-avoid-comparison-trap-for-sports-parents\/#Related_Articles_on_Kids_Mental_Game\" >Related Articles on Kids&#8217; Mental Game:<\/a><\/li><li class='ez-toc-page-1 ez-toc-heading-level-3'><a class=\"ez-toc-link ez-toc-heading-4\" href=\"https:\/\/www.youthsportspsychology.com\/youth_sports_psychology_blog\/how-to-avoid-comparison-trap-for-sports-parents\/#Improve_Your_Mental_Game_From_Anywhere_In_The_World\" >Improve Your Mental Game From Anywhere In The World<\/a><\/li><\/ul><\/li><\/ul><\/nav><\/div>\n\n\n\n\n<p>When we surveyed parents, we found that 23% said that kids judge how their teammates are performing instead of focusing on their own play.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p><strong>Focusing <\/strong>on others\u2019 play will distract your young athletes from their own game, and can become a major confidence killer.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>In the survey, parents said that kids compare themselves when they have friends who are more gifted as athletes, when other athletes of the same ability perform better than them, when opposing players are bigger or more athletic than they are&#8211;and more.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>When your sports children <strong>compare<\/strong> themselves to their friends or teammates, they\u2019re setting themselves up for a drop in confidence because they put other athletes &#8220;on a pedestal.&#8221;<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>Every time a teammate scores, makes a great play, or receives praise from the coach, it may hurt your kids\u2019 confidence.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>This thinking distracts your athletes from <strong>focusing<\/strong> on what&#8217;s important in the competitive arena.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<h3 class=\"wp-block-heading\"><span class=\"ez-toc-section\" id=\"Avoid_Comparison\"><\/span>Avoid Comparison<span class=\"ez-toc-section-end\"><\/span><\/h3>\n\n\n\n<p>In addition, concentrating on the strengths of other people may make your athletes raise expectations for themselves. When they fail to meet these expectations, they will likely become upset and lose confidence.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>Parents dealing with this issue should help kids become more aware of the fact that they are comparing themselves to others, and remind them why this is a bad idea.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>You as a parent need to be mindful of not <strong>comparing<\/strong> your athletes to other, more skill athletes. Your athletes may think they are not good enough when you do this.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>Instead of <strong>focusing<\/strong> on others, remind your athletes to focus on their own skills and strengths\u2026<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>What are they especially good at? What special talents do they have? Finally, remind them that an athlete who looks bigger or stronger is not necessarily a better athlete.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>Remind your athletes that other kids are human, just like them, and are likely to be nervous about playing or have their own doubts.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>Ask them to stop looking at other athletes they think are more skilled than them by <strong>focusing<\/strong> on their warm up and how they will prepare for the competition.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<hr class=\"wp-block-separator has-css-opacity is-style-dots\"\/>\n\n\n\n<h3 class=\"wp-block-heading\" id=\"related-articles-on-hockey-mental-game\"><span class=\"ez-toc-section\" id=\"Related_Articles_on_Kids_Mental_Game\"><\/span>Related Articles on Kids&#8217; Mental Game:<span class=\"ez-toc-section-end\"><\/span><\/h3>\n\n\n\n<ul class=\"wp-block-list\">\n<li><a href=\"https:\/\/www.youthsportspsychology.com\/youth_sports_psychology_blog\/help-sports-kids-turn-comparisons-into-growth-comradery\/\"><strong>Help Sports Kids Turn Comparisons into Growth &amp; Comradery<\/strong><\/a><\/li>\n\n\n\n<li><a href=\"https:\/\/www.youthsportspsychology.com\/youth_sports_psychology_blog\/athletes-who-make-comparisons-and-how-parents-contribute\/\"><strong>Athletes Who Make Comparisons And How Parents Contribute<\/strong><\/a><\/li>\n\n\n\n<li><a href=\"https:\/\/www.youthsportspsychology.com\/youth_sports_psychology_blog\/why-kids-self-confidence-suffers-when-sports-parents-make-comparisons\/\"><strong>Why Kids\u2019 Self-Confidence Suffers When Sports Parents Make Comparisons<\/strong><\/a><\/li>\n<\/ul>\n\n\n\n<p id=\"block-f49818fa-7c7a-4ee3-b5ee-66581aad2c71\">*Subscribe to\u00a0<a href=\"https:\/\/podcasts.apple.com\/us\/podcast\/sports-psychology-podcast-by-peaksports-com\/id152566009\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noreferrer noopener\"><strong>The Sports Psychology Podcast<\/strong><\/a>\u00a0on iTunes<br>*Subscribe to <a href=\"https:\/\/open.spotify.com\/show\/0ynyaalKxbnNmsoeL8gF5X?si=8224669de9b3435b\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noreferrer noopener\"><strong>The Sports Psychology Podcast<\/strong><\/a> on Spotify<\/p>\n\n\n\n<hr class=\"wp-block-separator has-css-opacity is-style-dots\"\/>\n\n\n\n<h3 class=\"wp-block-heading\"><span class=\"ez-toc-section\" id=\"Improve_Your_Mental_Game_From_Anywhere_In_The_World\"><\/span><strong>Improve Your Mental Game From Anywhere In The World<\/strong><span class=\"ez-toc-section-end\"><\/span><\/h3>\n\n\n<div class=\"wp-block-image\">\n<figure class=\"alignright is-resized\"><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" width=\"150\" height=\"150\" src=\"https:\/\/www.youthsportspsychology.com\/youth_sports_psychology_blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/11\/mental-training-for-young-athletes.png\" alt=\"\" class=\"wp-image-6868\" style=\"width:138px;height:auto\"\/><\/figure>\n<\/div>\n\n\n<p>We\u2019re certain that, as a parent,&nbsp;you want to help your child develop confidence and discipline in sports and life.&nbsp;And as a sports parent, you\u2019d love for your children to reach their potential in sports.&nbsp;But encouraging your child to <strong>strive for greatness without pressuring them<\/strong> can be a challenge.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>You can get expert mental coaching with us from anywhere. Meet with us via Zoom, Skype, FaceTime or phone call. With today\u2019s video technology, we are able to connect with athletes and coaches all over the globe.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"has-text-align-center\"><strong>Call Us Today to Schedule Your Free 15-Minute Session.<\/strong><br><strong>Find Out How Your Athlete Can Benefit From One-on-One Mental Coaching!<\/strong><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>Comparisons Hurt Athletes\u2019 Confidence When we surveyed parents, we found that 23% said that kids judge how their teammates are performing instead of focusing on their own play. Focusing on others\u2019 play will distract your young athletes from their own game, and can become a major confidence killer. In the &#8230; <a title=\"How to Avoid Comparison Trap for Sports Parents\" class=\"read-more\" href=\"https:\/\/www.youthsportspsychology.com\/youth_sports_psychology_blog\/how-to-avoid-comparison-trap-for-sports-parents\/\" aria-label=\"Read more about How to Avoid Comparison Trap for Sports Parents\">Read Sport Psychology Tip<\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":5222,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[26,5,28,27,23,17,7,6,12],"tags":[309],"class_list":["post-5218","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-confidence-in-young-athletes","category-kids-in-sports","category-perfectionism-in-sports","category-perfectionism-is-young-athletes","category-sports-kids","category-sports-parenting","category-sports-psychology-for-kids","category-youth-sports-psychology-blog","category-youth-sports-tips","tag-confidence-in-youth-sports"],"aioseo_notices":[],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.youthsportspsychology.com\/youth_sports_psychology_blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/5218","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.youthsportspsychology.com\/youth_sports_psychology_blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.youthsportspsychology.com\/youth_sports_psychology_blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.youthsportspsychology.com\/youth_sports_psychology_blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.youthsportspsychology.com\/youth_sports_psychology_blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=5218"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/www.youthsportspsychology.com\/youth_sports_psychology_blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/5218\/revisions"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.youthsportspsychology.com\/youth_sports_psychology_blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/5222"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.youthsportspsychology.com\/youth_sports_psychology_blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=5218"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.youthsportspsychology.com\/youth_sports_psychology_blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=5218"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.youthsportspsychology.com\/youth_sports_psychology_blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=5218"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}