{"id":584,"date":"2010-03-23T19:03:47","date_gmt":"2010-03-23T19:03:47","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.youthsportspsychology.com\/youth_sports_psychology_blog\/?p=584"},"modified":"2025-08-07T06:55:19","modified_gmt":"2025-08-07T10:55:19","slug":"letting-go-of-sports-kids-during-games-and-practice","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.youthsportspsychology.com\/youth_sports_psychology_blog\/letting-go-of-sports-kids-during-games-and-practice\/","title":{"rendered":"Letting Go of Sports Kids During Practice and Competition"},"content":{"rendered":"\n<h4 class=\"wp-block-heading has-text-align-center\"><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" class=\"size-full wp-image-3464 aligncenter\" src=\"https:\/\/www.youthsportspsychology.com\/youth_sports_psychology_blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2016\/11\/youth-sports-an-athletes-emotional-tank.jpg\" alt=\"Youth Sports Psychology\" width=\"600\" height=\"300\" srcset=\"https:\/\/www.youthsportspsychology.com\/youth_sports_psychology_blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2016\/11\/youth-sports-an-athletes-emotional-tank.jpg 600w, https:\/\/www.youthsportspsychology.com\/youth_sports_psychology_blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2016\/11\/youth-sports-an-athletes-emotional-tank-300x150.jpg 300w\" sizes=\"auto, (max-width: 600px) 100vw, 600px\" \/><\/h4>\n\n\n\n<h2 class=\"wp-block-heading has-text-align-center\"><span class=\"ez-toc-section\" id=\"Letting_Sports_Kids_be_Responsible_For_Their_Success\"><\/span>Letting Sports Kids be Responsible For Their Success<span class=\"ez-toc-section-end\"><\/span><\/h2><div id=\"ez-toc-container\" class=\"ez-toc-v2_0_82_2 ez-toc-wrap-center counter-hierarchy ez-toc-counter ez-toc-grey ez-toc-container-direction\">\n<div class=\"ez-toc-title-container\">\n<p class=\"ez-toc-title\" style=\"cursor:inherit\">Table of Contents<\/p>\n<span class=\"ez-toc-title-toggle\"><a href=\"#\" class=\"ez-toc-pull-right ez-toc-btn ez-toc-btn-xs ez-toc-btn-default ez-toc-toggle\" aria-label=\"Toggle Table of Content\"><span class=\"ez-toc-js-icon-con\"><span class=\"\"><span class=\"eztoc-hide\" style=\"display:none;\">Toggle<\/span><span class=\"ez-toc-icon-toggle-span\"><svg style=\"fill: #999;color:#999\" xmlns=\"http:\/\/www.w3.org\/2000\/svg\" class=\"list-377408\" width=\"20px\" height=\"20px\" viewBox=\"0 0 24 24\" fill=\"none\"><path d=\"M6 6H4v2h2V6zm14 0H8v2h12V6zM4 11h2v2H4v-2zm16 0H8v2h12v-2zM4 16h2v2H4v-2zm16 0H8v2h12v-2z\" fill=\"currentColor\"><\/path><\/svg><svg style=\"fill: #999;color:#999\" class=\"arrow-unsorted-368013\" xmlns=\"http:\/\/www.w3.org\/2000\/svg\" width=\"10px\" height=\"10px\" viewBox=\"0 0 24 24\" version=\"1.2\" baseProfile=\"tiny\"><path d=\"M18.2 9.3l-6.2-6.3-6.2 6.3c-.2.2-.3.4-.3.7s.1.5.3.7c.2.2.4.3.7.3h11c.3 0 .5-.1.7-.3.2-.2.3-.5.3-.7s-.1-.5-.3-.7zM5.8 14.7l6.2 6.3 6.2-6.3c.2-.2.3-.5.3-.7s-.1-.5-.3-.7c-.2-.2-.4-.3-.7-.3h-11c-.3 0-.5.1-.7.3-.2.2-.3.5-.3.7s.1.5.3.7z\"\/><\/svg><\/span><\/span><\/span><\/a><\/span><\/div>\n<nav><ul class='ez-toc-list ez-toc-list-level-1 ' ><li class='ez-toc-page-1 ez-toc-heading-level-2'><a class=\"ez-toc-link ez-toc-heading-1\" href=\"https:\/\/www.youthsportspsychology.com\/youth_sports_psychology_blog\/letting-go-of-sports-kids-during-games-and-practice\/#Letting_Sports_Kids_be_Responsible_For_Their_Success\" >Letting Sports Kids be Responsible For Their Success<\/a><ul class='ez-toc-list-level-4' ><li class='ez-toc-heading-level-4'><ul class='ez-toc-list-level-4' ><li class='ez-toc-heading-level-4'><a class=\"ez-toc-link ez-toc-heading-2\" href=\"https:\/\/www.youthsportspsychology.com\/youth_sports_psychology_blog\/letting-go-of-sports-kids-during-games-and-practice\/#Sports_can_be_a_safe_place_for_kids_to_gain_experience_with_both_successes_and_failures_he_says\" >Sports can be a safe place for kids to gain experience with both successes and failures, he says.<\/a><\/li><\/ul><\/li><li class='ez-toc-page-1 ez-toc-heading-level-3'><a class=\"ez-toc-link ez-toc-heading-3\" href=\"https:\/\/www.youthsportspsychology.com\/youth_sports_psychology_blog\/letting-go-of-sports-kids-during-games-and-practice\/#Related_Articles_on_Youth_Sports\" >Related Articles on Youth Sports:<\/a><\/li><li class='ez-toc-page-1 ez-toc-heading-level-3'><a class=\"ez-toc-link ez-toc-heading-4\" href=\"https:\/\/www.youthsportspsychology.com\/youth_sports_psychology_blog\/letting-go-of-sports-kids-during-games-and-practice\/#Help_Young_Athletes_Boost_Confidence_in_Sports\" >Help Young Athletes Boost Confidence in Sports!<\/a><\/li><\/ul><\/li><\/ul><\/nav><\/div>\n\n\n\n\n<p>Sports parents need to release their young athletes to the game.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>That\u2019s the word from H. Rothenberg, who has run a basketball program for 20 years and is the owner of Triple C Camp, Charlottesville, Va.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>What exactly does he mean by this and how can this improve your kids\u2019 <strong>success<\/strong> in sports?<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>When sports kids approach middle school, and sports become more competitive, it\u2019s time for parents to take a step back and let go of their children, he says. Let them be responsible for their own <strong>successes<\/strong> and failures. This will allow sports kids to grow and develop, he says.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p><em>\u201cAt ages 5, 6, and 7, parents put kids in sports for exercise and recreation. As they get older, their investment steps up a notch. Parents often take on too much instead of releasing their child to the game,\u201d<\/em> says Rothenberg, whose camps <strong>focus<\/strong> on sports.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<h4 class=\"wp-block-heading\"><span class=\"ez-toc-section\" id=\"Sports_can_be_a_safe_place_for_kids_to_gain_experience_with_both_successes_and_failures_he_says\"><\/span>Sports can be a safe place for kids to gain experience with both <strong>successes<\/strong> and failures, he says.<span class=\"ez-toc-section-end\"><\/span><\/h4>\n\n\n\n<p>Here at the Ultimate Sports Parent and Kids\u2019 Sports Psychology, we agree with Rothenberg. You want the sports experience to be your child\u2019s experience\u2014not yours.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>Often, parents get so wrapped up in the excitement of youth sports that the experience becomes more about the parents than the kids. Keep this in mind. For example, Rothenberg says, if the coach asks kids to fill out forms at the beginning of the season, let the kids fill them out.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>However, it\u2019s critical, before you step back, to feel comfortable with your child\u2019s coach and program&#8230;<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>Before you sign up your young athlete, it\u2019s a good idea to interview the coach about his or her <strong>philosophy<\/strong> and ensure it\u2019s a philosophy you agree with:<\/p>\n\n\n\n<ul class=\"wp-block-list\">\n<li>How does the coach handle playing time?<\/li>\n\n\n\n<li>Does the coach create an atmosphere that <strong>encourages teamwork?<\/strong><\/li>\n\n\n\n<li>Watch the coach in action. Is he or she <strong>supportive<\/strong> and <strong>encouraging?<\/strong> Or does he or she yell and criticize? (We hope not!)<\/li>\n<\/ul>\n\n\n\n<p>Once you feel comfortable with a coach, that\u2019s when you start \u201creleasing\u201d your child to the game, as Rothenberg says. Let the coaches do their job.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>Support the coaches. Don\u2019t coach your sports kids or tell them that the coach isn\u2019t doing things right. That only confuses kids.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>Again, you need to give your young athletes the <strong>freedom<\/strong> to learn from their own mistakes and <strong>successes.<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n<hr class=\"wp-block-separator has-alpha-channel-opacity is-style-dots\"\/>\n\n\n\n<h3 class=\"wp-block-heading\" id=\"related-articles-on-hockey-mental-game\"><span class=\"ez-toc-section\" id=\"Related_Articles_on_Youth_Sports\"><\/span>Related Articles on Youth Sports:<span class=\"ez-toc-section-end\"><\/span><\/h3>\n\n\n\n<ul class=\"wp-block-list\">\n<li><a href=\"https:\/\/www.youthsportspsychology.com\/youth_sports_psychology_blog\/goals-vs-expectations-for-kids\/\"><strong>Goals vs. Expectations for Kids<\/strong><\/a><\/li>\n\n\n\n<li><a href=\"https:\/\/www.youthsportspsychology.com\/youth_sports_psychology_blog\/helping-kids-see-the-good-and-bad-of-perfectionism-in-sports\/\"><strong>Helping Kids See the Good and Bad of Perfectionism in Sports<\/strong><\/a><\/li>\n\n\n\n<li><a href=\"https:\/\/www.youthsportspsychology.com\/youth_sports_psychology_blog\/how-kids-can-learn-to-make-the-most-of-mistake-while-competing\/\"><strong>How Kids Can Learn to Make the Most of Mistakes While Competing<\/strong><\/a><\/li>\n<\/ul>\n\n\n\n<p id=\"block-f49818fa-7c7a-4ee3-b5ee-66581aad2c71\">*Subscribe to\u00a0<a href=\"https:\/\/podcasts.apple.com\/us\/podcast\/sports-psychology-podcast-by-peaksports-com\/id152566009\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noreferrer noopener\"><strong>The Sports Psychology Podcast<\/strong><\/a>\u00a0on iTunes<br>*Subscribe to <strong><a href=\"https:\/\/open.spotify.com\/show\/0ynyaalKxbnNmsoeL8gF5X?si=8224669de9b3435b\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noreferrer noopener\">The Sports Psychology Podcast<\/a> <\/strong>on Spotify<\/p>\n\n\n\n<hr class=\"wp-block-separator has-alpha-channel-opacity is-style-dots\"\/>\n\n\n\n<h3 class=\"wp-block-heading\"><span class=\"ez-toc-section\" id=\"Help_Young_Athletes_Boost_Confidence_in_Sports\"><\/span>Help Young Athletes Boost Confidence in Sports!<span class=\"ez-toc-section-end\"><\/span><\/h3>\n\n\n<div class=\"wp-block-image\">\n<figure class=\"alignright size-full is-resized\"><a href=\"https:\/\/www.youthsportspsychology.com\/youth_sports_psychology_blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2018\/10\/ultimate-sports-parent-small.jpg\"><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" width=\"225\" height=\"250\" src=\"https:\/\/www.youthsportspsychology.com\/youth_sports_psychology_blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2018\/10\/ultimate-sports-parent-small.jpg\" alt=\"The Ultimate Sports Parent\" class=\"wp-image-11157\" style=\"width:167px;height:auto\"\/><\/a><\/figure>\n<\/div>\n\n\n<p>Every day, we receive letters from parents like you who want their children and teens to excel in sports. However, these parents can <strong>see fear, doubt, and frustration on the faces of their kids<\/strong> who struggle with the \u201cinner\u201d game of sports. But these parents have no idea how to help their kids <strong>overcome the worries, expectations and self-defeating thoughts<\/strong> that prevent their young athletes from feeling confident and successful.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>You can benefit from our 1<strong>5-plus years\u2019 of work in sports psychology and sports parenting research<\/strong>. Now, you can <strong>tap into our secrets to sports success<\/strong> through a cutting-edge, 14-day program that helps young athletes overcome the top \u201cmental game\u201d challenges that sports parents face\u2014and the top <strong>challenges young athletes face<\/strong>.<\/p>\n\n\n<div class=\"gb-container gb-container-fbab03ed\">\n\n<a class=\"gb-button gb-button-fa7bf2e7 gb-button-text\" href=\"https:\/\/www.peaksports.com\/ultimate-sports-parent-workbook-cd-program\/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener noreferrer\">GET DETAILS<\/a>\n\n\n\n<a class=\"gb-button gb-button-33bcee1d gb-button-text\" href=\"https:\/\/shop.peaksports.com\/products\/the-ultimate-sports-parent-digital\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener noreferrer\">BUY NOW<\/a>\n\n<\/div>","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>Letting Sports Kids be Responsible For Their Success Sports parents need to release their young athletes to the game. That\u2019s the word from H. Rothenberg, who has run a basketball program for 20 years and is the owner of Triple C Camp, Charlottesville, Va. What exactly does he mean by &#8230; <a title=\"Letting Go of Sports Kids During Practice and Competition\" class=\"read-more\" href=\"https:\/\/www.youthsportspsychology.com\/youth_sports_psychology_blog\/letting-go-of-sports-kids-during-games-and-practice\/\" aria-label=\"Read more about Letting Go of Sports Kids During Practice and Competition\">Read Sport Psychology Tip<\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":3463,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[35,18,20,6],"tags":[411,259,262,117],"class_list":["post-584","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-pressure-from-parents","category-young-athletes-pressure","category-youth-sports-coaching","category-youth-sports-psychology-blog","tag-letting-sports-kids-play","tag-sports-parenting","tag-youth-sports-coaching","tag-youth-sports-psychology","resize-featured-image"],"aioseo_notices":[],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.youthsportspsychology.com\/youth_sports_psychology_blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/584","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.youthsportspsychology.com\/youth_sports_psychology_blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.youthsportspsychology.com\/youth_sports_psychology_blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.youthsportspsychology.com\/youth_sports_psychology_blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.youthsportspsychology.com\/youth_sports_psychology_blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=584"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/www.youthsportspsychology.com\/youth_sports_psychology_blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/584\/revisions"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.youthsportspsychology.com\/youth_sports_psychology_blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/3463"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.youthsportspsychology.com\/youth_sports_psychology_blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=584"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.youthsportspsychology.com\/youth_sports_psychology_blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=584"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.youthsportspsychology.com\/youth_sports_psychology_blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=584"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}