{"id":6740,"date":"2020-08-27T17:36:14","date_gmt":"2020-08-27T17:36:14","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/www.youthsportspsychology.com\/youth_sports_psychology_blog\/?p=6740"},"modified":"2025-08-11T05:48:56","modified_gmt":"2025-08-11T09:48:56","slug":"why-mind-reading-hurts-confidence-for-athletes","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.youthsportspsychology.com\/youth_sports_psychology_blog\/why-mind-reading-hurts-confidence-for-athletes\/","title":{"rendered":"Why Mind Reading Hurts Confidence for Athletes"},"content":{"rendered":"<div class=\"wp-block-image\">\n<figure class=\"aligncenter size-large\"><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" width=\"600\" height=\"300\" src=\"https:\/\/www.youthsportspsychology.com\/youth_sports_psychology_blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/05\/young-athletes-who-perform-tight-or-nervous-1.jpg\" alt=\"\" class=\"wp-image-5278\" srcset=\"https:\/\/www.youthsportspsychology.com\/youth_sports_psychology_blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/05\/young-athletes-who-perform-tight-or-nervous-1.jpg 600w, https:\/\/www.youthsportspsychology.com\/youth_sports_psychology_blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/05\/young-athletes-who-perform-tight-or-nervous-1-300x150.jpg 300w\" sizes=\"auto, (max-width: 600px) 100vw, 600px\" \/><\/figure>\n<\/div>\n\n\n<h2 class=\"wp-block-heading has-text-align-center\"><span class=\"ez-toc-section\" id=\"Helping_Young_Athletes_Deal_with_Social_Approval\"><\/span>Helping Young Athletes Deal with Social Approval<span class=\"ez-toc-section-end\"><\/span><\/h2><div id=\"ez-toc-container\" class=\"ez-toc-v2_0_83 ez-toc-wrap-center counter-hierarchy ez-toc-counter ez-toc-grey ez-toc-container-direction\">\n<div class=\"ez-toc-title-container\">\n<p class=\"ez-toc-title\" style=\"cursor:inherit\">Table of Contents<\/p>\n<span class=\"ez-toc-title-toggle\"><a href=\"#\" class=\"ez-toc-pull-right ez-toc-btn ez-toc-btn-xs ez-toc-btn-default ez-toc-toggle\" aria-label=\"Toggle Table of Content\"><span class=\"ez-toc-js-icon-con\"><span class=\"\"><span class=\"eztoc-hide\" style=\"display:none;\">Toggle<\/span><span class=\"ez-toc-icon-toggle-span\"><svg style=\"fill: #999;color:#999\" xmlns=\"http:\/\/www.w3.org\/2000\/svg\" class=\"list-377408\" width=\"20px\" height=\"20px\" viewBox=\"0 0 24 24\" fill=\"none\"><path d=\"M6 6H4v2h2V6zm14 0H8v2h12V6zM4 11h2v2H4v-2zm16 0H8v2h12v-2zM4 16h2v2H4v-2zm16 0H8v2h12v-2z\" fill=\"currentColor\"><\/path><\/svg><svg style=\"fill: #999;color:#999\" class=\"arrow-unsorted-368013\" xmlns=\"http:\/\/www.w3.org\/2000\/svg\" width=\"10px\" height=\"10px\" viewBox=\"0 0 24 24\" version=\"1.2\" baseProfile=\"tiny\"><path d=\"M18.2 9.3l-6.2-6.3-6.2 6.3c-.2.2-.3.4-.3.7s.1.5.3.7c.2.2.4.3.7.3h11c.3 0 .5-.1.7-.3.2-.2.3-.5.3-.7s-.1-.5-.3-.7zM5.8 14.7l6.2 6.3 6.2-6.3c.2-.2.3-.5.3-.7s-.1-.5-.3-.7c-.2-.2-.4-.3-.7-.3h-11c-.3 0-.5.1-.7.3-.2.2-.3.5-.3.7s.1.5.3.7z\"\/><\/svg><\/span><\/span><\/span><\/a><\/span><\/div>\n<nav><ul class='ez-toc-list ez-toc-list-level-1 ' ><li class='ez-toc-page-1 ez-toc-heading-level-2'><a class=\"ez-toc-link ez-toc-heading-1\" href=\"https:\/\/www.youthsportspsychology.com\/youth_sports_psychology_blog\/why-mind-reading-hurts-confidence-for-athletes\/#Helping_Young_Athletes_Deal_with_Social_Approval\" >Helping Young Athletes Deal with Social Approval<\/a><ul class='ez-toc-list-level-4' ><li class='ez-toc-heading-level-4'><ul class='ez-toc-list-level-4' ><li class='ez-toc-heading-level-4'><a class=\"ez-toc-link ez-toc-heading-2\" href=\"https:\/\/www.youthsportspsychology.com\/youth_sports_psychology_blog\/why-mind-reading-hurts-confidence-for-athletes\/#Young_athletes_need_to_understand_that_this_type_of_mind_reading_kills_confidence\" >Young athletes need to understand that this type of mind reading kills confidence.<\/a><\/li><\/ul><\/li><li class='ez-toc-page-1 ez-toc-heading-level-3'><a class=\"ez-toc-link ez-toc-heading-3\" href=\"https:\/\/www.youthsportspsychology.com\/youth_sports_psychology_blog\/why-mind-reading-hurts-confidence-for-athletes\/#Related_Articles_on_Youth_Sports\" >Related Articles on Youth Sports:<\/a><\/li><li class='ez-toc-page-1 ez-toc-heading-level-3'><a class=\"ez-toc-link ez-toc-heading-4\" href=\"https:\/\/www.youthsportspsychology.com\/youth_sports_psychology_blog\/why-mind-reading-hurts-confidence-for-athletes\/#The_Composed_Sports_Kid\" >The Composed Sports Kid<\/a><\/li><\/ul><\/li><\/ul><\/nav><\/div>\n\n\n\n\n<p>Many young athletes worry too much about what others think of them. These athletes worry that teammates, coaches, parents and friends might think badly of them.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>People who worry about what others think are struggling with <strong>social approval challenges<\/strong>.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>Kids who think this way want to be admired, accepted, respected or liked by other athletes, coaches or teammates. Part of this is just human nature, but beware: Seeking social approval can become a <strong>confidence<\/strong> killer for young athletes.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>Athletes who worry about what others think engage in a process called \u201c<strong>mind reading<\/strong>.\u201d They make unfounded <strong>assumptions<\/strong> about what others think of them.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>When kids are sure others believe they are not performing well, it can undermine their confidence.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>Truth is, kids can\u2019t read others\u2019 minds. The only way to know what\u2019s inside people\u2019s heads is to hear them say what\u2019s on their minds.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>A ball player recently told us that he thinks about what the coach is thinking about him. He believes the coach thinks he\u2019s throwing too many balls. He thinks the coach will take him out of the game.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<h4 class=\"wp-block-heading\"><span class=\"ez-toc-section\" id=\"Young_athletes_need_to_understand_that_this_type_of_mind_reading_kills_confidence\"><\/span>Young athletes need to understand that this type of <strong>mind reading<\/strong> kills <strong>confidence<\/strong>.<span class=\"ez-toc-section-end\"><\/span><\/h4>\n\n\n\n<p>Athletes mind read into a lot of things that aren\u2019t based in reality. So how can they stop <strong>mind reading<\/strong>?<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>They should first be aware of who they\u2019re focusing on. Are they trying to read into the minds of coaches, parents, team mates or all of them?<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>Next, they need to identify some of their <strong>assumptions<\/strong> about others. Maybe they assume a team mate thinks they should be taken out of the game. Help them be aware of such thoughts, then cut those thoughts off. Help them refocus.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>We worked with a volleyball player who said she thinks about what her parents are thinking while in the stands 40 percent of the time she\u2019s playing. This is a big <strong>confidence<\/strong> buster.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>She doesn\u2019t have the mental energy to focus on what\u2019s going on on the court. Like other young athletes, she needs to learn how to recognize what\u2019s going on in her head and regroup so she\u2019s no longer distracted by such thoughts. She should focus on whatever she needs to do right now during the game to be successful.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>Bottom line: Kids need to recognize and banish <strong>assumptions<\/strong> about what others are thinking about them.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<hr class=\"wp-block-separator has-css-opacity is-style-dots\"\/>\n\n\n\n<h3 class=\"wp-block-heading\" id=\"related-articles-on-hockey-mental-game\"><span class=\"ez-toc-section\" id=\"Related_Articles_on_Youth_Sports\"><\/span>Related Articles on Youth Sports:<span class=\"ez-toc-section-end\"><\/span><\/h3>\n\n\n\n<ul class=\"wp-block-list\">\n<li><a href=\"https:\/\/www.youthsportspsychology.com\/youth_sports_psychology_blog\/help-sports-kids-grow-from-adversity\/\" title=\"Help Sports Kids Grow From Adversity\"><\/a><a href=\"https:\/\/www.youthsportspsychology.com\/youth_sports_psychology_blog\/how-can-mindfulness-help-young-athletes\/\"><strong>How Can Mindfulness Help Young Athletes?<\/strong><\/a><\/li>\n\n\n\n<li><a href=\"https:\/\/www.youthsportspsychology.com\/youth_sports_psychology_blog\/teaching-athletes-to-feel-the-pain-of-failure-with-growth-mindsets\/\"><strong>Teaching Athletes to Feel The Pain of Failure with \u201cGrowth Mindsets\u201d [Podcast]<\/strong><\/a><\/li>\n\n\n\n<li><a href=\"https:\/\/www.youthsportspsychology.com\/youth_sports_psychology_blog\/how-athletes-can-stop-overthinking\/\" title=\"How Athletes Can Stop Overthinking\u00a0\"><\/a><a href=\"https:\/\/www.youthsportspsychology.com\/youth_sports_psychology_blog\/sports-kids-worry-watching-play\/\"><strong>Athletes Who Worry About Who\u2019s Watching Them Play<\/strong><\/a><\/li>\n<\/ul>\n\n\n\n<p id=\"block-f49818fa-7c7a-4ee3-b5ee-66581aad2c71\">*Subscribe to\u00a0<a href=\"https:\/\/podcasts.apple.com\/us\/podcast\/sports-psychology-podcast-by-peaksports-com\/id152566009\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noreferrer noopener\"><strong>The Sports Psychology Podcast<\/strong><\/a>\u00a0on iTunes<br>*Subscribe to <a href=\"https:\/\/open.spotify.com\/show\/0ynyaalKxbnNmsoeL8gF5X?si=8224669de9b3435b\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noreferrer noopener\"><strong>The Sports Psychology Podcast<\/strong><\/a> on Spotify<\/p>\n\n\n\n<hr class=\"wp-block-separator has-css-opacity is-style-dots\"\/>\n\n\n\n<h3 class=\"wp-block-heading\"><span class=\"ez-toc-section\" id=\"The_Composed_Sports_Kid\"><\/span>The Composed Sports Kid<span class=\"ez-toc-section-end\"><\/span><\/h3>\n\n\n<div class=\"wp-block-image\">\n<figure class=\"alignright size-full is-resized\"><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" width=\"225\" height=\"250\" src=\"https:\/\/www.youthsportspsychology.com\/youth_sports_psychology_blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2010\/03\/composed-sports-kid-small-1.jpg\" alt=\"The Composed Sports Kid\" class=\"wp-image-11173\" style=\"width:170px\"\/><\/figure>\n<\/div>\n\n\n<p>&#8220;The Composed Sports Kid&#8221; audio&nbsp;and workbook digital download program for young athletes and their parents or coach helps kids cope with frustration and anger in sports. Help your sports kids learn how to manage expectations and let go of mistakes so they can keep their head in the game.&nbsp;<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p><em><strong>The Composed Sports Kid system<\/strong><\/em>&nbsp;is really two programs in one\u2013one program to train parents and coaches how to help their kids practice composure, and one program that teaches young athletes\u2013<em>ages 6 to 13<\/em>\u2013how to improve composure, let go of mistakes quickly, have more self-acceptance,&nbsp;<strong>and thus enjoy sports more<\/strong>!&nbsp;<\/p>\n\n\n<div class=\"gb-container gb-container-26bcd9b3\">\n\n<a class=\"gb-button gb-button-903b6244 gb-button-text\" href=\"https:\/\/www.peaksports.com\/the-confident-sports-kid-cd-program\/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener noreferrer\">GET DETAILS<\/a>\n\n\n\n<a class=\"gb-button gb-button-3275f4fd gb-button-text\" href=\"https:\/\/shop.peaksports.com\/collections\/confident-sports-kid-series-digital-version\/products\/the-confident-sports-kid-bundle-digital\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener noreferrer\">BUY NOW<\/a>\n\n<\/div>","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>Helping Young Athletes Deal with Social Approval Many young athletes worry too much about what others think of them. These athletes worry that teammates, coaches, parents and friends might think badly of them. People who worry about what others think are struggling with social approval challenges. Kids who think this &#8230; <a title=\"Why Mind Reading Hurts Confidence for Athletes\" class=\"read-more\" href=\"https:\/\/www.youthsportspsychology.com\/youth_sports_psychology_blog\/why-mind-reading-hurts-confidence-for-athletes\/\" aria-label=\"Read more about Why Mind Reading Hurts Confidence for Athletes\">Read Sport Psychology Tip<\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":5279,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[6],"tags":[273,637],"class_list":["post-6740","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-youth-sports-psychology-blog","tag-confidence-busters","tag-social-approval-in-youth-sports"],"aioseo_notices":[],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.youthsportspsychology.com\/youth_sports_psychology_blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/6740","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.youthsportspsychology.com\/youth_sports_psychology_blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.youthsportspsychology.com\/youth_sports_psychology_blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.youthsportspsychology.com\/youth_sports_psychology_blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.youthsportspsychology.com\/youth_sports_psychology_blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=6740"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/www.youthsportspsychology.com\/youth_sports_psychology_blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/6740\/revisions"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.youthsportspsychology.com\/youth_sports_psychology_blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/5279"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.youthsportspsychology.com\/youth_sports_psychology_blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=6740"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.youthsportspsychology.com\/youth_sports_psychology_blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=6740"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.youthsportspsychology.com\/youth_sports_psychology_blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=6740"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}