{"id":924,"date":"2010-12-15T15:58:05","date_gmt":"2010-12-15T15:58:05","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.youthsportspsychology.com\/youth_sports_psychology_blog\/?p=924"},"modified":"2025-08-11T05:47:37","modified_gmt":"2025-08-11T09:47:37","slug":"when-young-athletes-drop-out-of-sport-due-to-bullying","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.youthsportspsychology.com\/youth_sports_psychology_blog\/when-young-athletes-drop-out-of-sport-due-to-bullying\/","title":{"rendered":"When Young Athletes Drop Out of Sport Due to Bullying"},"content":{"rendered":"<div class=\"wp-block-image\">\n<figure class=\"aligncenter\"><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" width=\"600\" height=\"300\" src=\"https:\/\/www.youthsportspsychology.com\/youth_sports_psychology_blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2016\/11\/parent-communication-with-sports-kids-who-lash-out-1.jpg\" alt=\"Youth Sports Psychology\" class=\"wp-image-3632\" srcset=\"https:\/\/www.youthsportspsychology.com\/youth_sports_psychology_blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2016\/11\/parent-communication-with-sports-kids-who-lash-out-1.jpg 600w, https:\/\/www.youthsportspsychology.com\/youth_sports_psychology_blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2016\/11\/parent-communication-with-sports-kids-who-lash-out-1-300x150.jpg 300w\" sizes=\"auto, (max-width: 600px) 100vw, 600px\" \/><\/figure>\n<\/div>\n\n\n<h2 class=\"wp-block-heading has-text-align-center\"><span class=\"ez-toc-section\" id=\"Feeling_Unsafe_in_Youth_Sports\"><\/span>Feeling Unsafe in Youth Sports<span class=\"ez-toc-section-end\"><\/span><\/h2><div id=\"ez-toc-container\" class=\"ez-toc-v2_0_83 ez-toc-wrap-center counter-hierarchy ez-toc-counter ez-toc-grey ez-toc-container-direction\">\n<div class=\"ez-toc-title-container\">\n<p class=\"ez-toc-title\" style=\"cursor:inherit\">Table of Contents<\/p>\n<span class=\"ez-toc-title-toggle\"><a href=\"#\" class=\"ez-toc-pull-right ez-toc-btn ez-toc-btn-xs ez-toc-btn-default ez-toc-toggle\" aria-label=\"Toggle Table of Content\"><span class=\"ez-toc-js-icon-con\"><span class=\"\"><span class=\"eztoc-hide\" style=\"display:none;\">Toggle<\/span><span class=\"ez-toc-icon-toggle-span\"><svg style=\"fill: #999;color:#999\" xmlns=\"http:\/\/www.w3.org\/2000\/svg\" class=\"list-377408\" width=\"20px\" height=\"20px\" viewBox=\"0 0 24 24\" fill=\"none\"><path d=\"M6 6H4v2h2V6zm14 0H8v2h12V6zM4 11h2v2H4v-2zm16 0H8v2h12v-2zM4 16h2v2H4v-2zm16 0H8v2h12v-2z\" fill=\"currentColor\"><\/path><\/svg><svg style=\"fill: #999;color:#999\" class=\"arrow-unsorted-368013\" xmlns=\"http:\/\/www.w3.org\/2000\/svg\" width=\"10px\" height=\"10px\" viewBox=\"0 0 24 24\" version=\"1.2\" baseProfile=\"tiny\"><path d=\"M18.2 9.3l-6.2-6.3-6.2 6.3c-.2.2-.3.4-.3.7s.1.5.3.7c.2.2.4.3.7.3h11c.3 0 .5-.1.7-.3.2-.2.3-.5.3-.7s-.1-.5-.3-.7zM5.8 14.7l6.2 6.3 6.2-6.3c.2-.2.3-.5.3-.7s-.1-.5-.3-.7c-.2-.2-.4-.3-.7-.3h-11c-.3 0-.5.1-.7.3-.2.2-.3.5-.3.7s.1.5.3.7z\"\/><\/svg><\/span><\/span><\/span><\/a><\/span><\/div>\n<nav><ul class='ez-toc-list ez-toc-list-level-1 ' ><li class='ez-toc-page-1 ez-toc-heading-level-2'><a class=\"ez-toc-link ez-toc-heading-1\" href=\"https:\/\/www.youthsportspsychology.com\/youth_sports_psychology_blog\/when-young-athletes-drop-out-of-sport-due-to-bullying\/#Feeling_Unsafe_in_Youth_Sports\" >Feeling Unsafe in Youth Sports<\/a><ul class='ez-toc-list-level-4' ><li class='ez-toc-heading-level-4'><ul class='ez-toc-list-level-4' ><li class='ez-toc-heading-level-4'><a class=\"ez-toc-link ez-toc-heading-2\" href=\"https:\/\/www.youthsportspsychology.com\/youth_sports_psychology_blog\/when-young-athletes-drop-out-of-sport-due-to-bullying\/#If_your_young_athletes_are_ever_on_a_team_where_they_dont_feel_safe_you_have_two_choices%E2%80%A6\" >If your young athletes are ever on a team where they don\u2019t feel safe, you have two choices&#8230;.<\/a><\/li><\/ul><\/li><li class='ez-toc-page-1 ez-toc-heading-level-3'><a class=\"ez-toc-link ez-toc-heading-3\" href=\"https:\/\/www.youthsportspsychology.com\/youth_sports_psychology_blog\/when-young-athletes-drop-out-of-sport-due-to-bullying\/#Related_Articles_on_Kids_Mental_Game\" >Related Articles on Kids&#8217; Mental Game:<\/a><\/li><li class='ez-toc-page-1 ez-toc-heading-level-3'><a class=\"ez-toc-link ez-toc-heading-4\" href=\"https:\/\/www.youthsportspsychology.com\/youth_sports_psychology_blog\/when-young-athletes-drop-out-of-sport-due-to-bullying\/#Improve_Your_Mental_Game_From_Anywhere_In_The_World\" >Improve Your Mental Game From Anywhere In The World<\/a><\/li><\/ul><\/li><\/ul><\/nav><\/div>\n\n\n\n\n<p>Steve, a sports dad and coach, recently called us to tell us about the worst thing that can happen to a talented young athlete, from a <strong>mental-game<\/strong> perspective.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>A 14-year-old hockey goalie was offered a position on a high-level team in a different state, and actually moved to that state to take the position&#8230;.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>He lived with the family of another player on the team, and the other player <strong>bullied<\/strong> him for being Jewish. He moved in with another family, but continued to be treated badly by his teammates. He went home and<strong> quit<\/strong> hockey altogether.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p><em>\u201cSports should be a sanctuary, a place where everyone should feel safe,\u201d <\/em>says Steve.<em> \u201cThe fact that he didn\u2019t feel safe with his team mates ruined the sport for him.\u201d<\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>We agree with Steve. If kids don\u2019t feel safe, it\u2019s hard for them in many ways\u2014socially and emotionally, of course.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>From a <strong>mental game perspective,<\/strong> feeling unsafe also makes it very difficult for young athletes to perform freely. They become fearful. This can affect their <strong>mental game<\/strong> so much they don\u2019t have their game any more. In this case, the boy\u2019s <strong>confidence<\/strong> plummeted.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<h4 class=\"wp-block-heading\"><span class=\"ez-toc-section\" id=\"If_your_young_athletes_are_ever_on_a_team_where_they_dont_feel_safe_you_have_two_choices%E2%80%A6\"><\/span>If your young athletes are ever on a team where they don\u2019t feel safe, you have two choices&#8230;.<span class=\"ez-toc-section-end\"><\/span><\/h4>\n\n\n\n<p>(1) You can either try to change the team\u2019s dynamics by talking with the coach\u2014or (2) you can find another team.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>You need to take action before your young athlete\u2019s <strong>confidence<\/strong> plummets so far he or she quits sports. Too often, sports parents don\u2019t take action in these types of situations.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p><em>\u201cThe coach missed an opportunity to teach these kids an extremely valuable lesson,\u201d <\/em>Steve says.<em> \u201cYou shouldn\u2019t let the victim quit the team. You should take the <strong>bullies<\/strong> off the team and have a conference with the whole team to show this can\u2019t be tolerated.\u201d<\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>When young athletes decide to stick it out in the face of these kinds of social challenges&#8211;which can come from coaches, other athletes or parents&#8211;they need to take advantage of <strong>mental game strategies.<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>First of all, as hard as it might sound, they have to find ways to change their <strong>focus<\/strong> so they don\u2019t worry so much about what others think of them.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>To do this, they need to take a look at their self-concept. Ask them to make a list of all their great traits. They may be sensitive, intelligent, compassionate or great team players. Ask them to remind themselves that no matter others say or do, they are still that <strong>sensitive, intelligent, compassionate team player.<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>Young athletes who face such social challenges and decide to stick it out should also work on their <strong>focus.<\/strong> You don\u2019t want them to be distracted by people who taunt them or insult them.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>They must learn to <strong>focus<\/strong> only on what&#8217;s relevant to their performance. For example, during a tennis serve, players must focus on a number of smaller tasks&#8211;getting their feet in position, feeling <strong>relaxed, focusing<\/strong> on the ball toss, <strong>trusting<\/strong> their abilities and thinking about the target.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>Kids need to learn how to become immersed in the process and all the smaller steps involved in the serve. When kids can learn to <strong>focus<\/strong> on these smaller tasks, and <strong>refocus<\/strong> when needed, they won\u2019t focus on others\u2019 behavior.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>Want to learn more about how to improve your sports parenting skills, help your kids cope with <strong>confidence<\/strong> challenges, and make the most of their abilities? At Kids\u2019 Sports Psychology, we have many resources for you.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p><strong>For example<\/strong>:<\/p>\n\n\n\n<ul class=\"wp-block-list\">\n<li>\u201cGrowing From Adversity: How to Stay Confident After Failure,\u201d an e-book for sports kids.<\/li>\n\n\n\n<li>\u201cFocus to the Max!\u201d an e-book for sports kids.<\/li>\n\n\n\n<li>\u201cInsides the Minds of Young Athletes 1: Miguel Worries about Peer Approval,\u201d a video with tips for addressing worries about peer approval.<\/li>\n<\/ul>\n\n\n\n<p>Plus, exclusive members of Kids\u2019 Sports Psychology can download many more e-books, audio interviews with experts, videos, articles and much more.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<hr class=\"wp-block-separator has-alpha-channel-opacity is-style-dots\"\/>\n\n\n\n<h3 class=\"wp-block-heading\" id=\"related-articles-on-hockey-mental-game\"><span class=\"ez-toc-section\" id=\"Related_Articles_on_Kids_Mental_Game\"><\/span>Related Articles on Kids&#8217; Mental Game:<span class=\"ez-toc-section-end\"><\/span><\/h3>\n\n\n\n<ul class=\"wp-block-list\">\n<li><a href=\"https:\/\/www.youthsportspsychology.com\/youth_sports_psychology_blog\/why-girls-drop-out-of-sports-at-higher-rates-than-boys\/\"><strong>Why Girls Drop out of Sports at Higher Rates than Boys<\/strong><\/a><\/li>\n\n\n\n<li><a href=\"https:\/\/www.youthsportspsychology.com\/youth_sports_psychology_blog\/addressing-anxiety-mistakes-and-low-confidence-in-youth-sports\/\"><\/a><a href=\"https:\/\/www.youthsportspsychology.com\/youth_sports_psychology_blog\/why-girls-drop-out-of-sports-more-often-than-boys\/\"><strong>Why Girls Drop out of Sports More than Boys<\/strong><\/a><\/li>\n\n\n\n<li><a href=\"https:\/\/www.youthsportspsychology.com\/youth_sports_psychology_blog\/girls-drop-out-rate-higher-than-boys\/\"><strong>Girls Drop Out Rate Higher Than Boys<\/strong><\/a><\/li>\n<\/ul>\n\n\n\n<p id=\"block-f49818fa-7c7a-4ee3-b5ee-66581aad2c71\">*Subscribe to\u00a0<strong><a href=\"https:\/\/podcasts.apple.com\/us\/podcast\/sports-psychology-podcast-by-peaksports-com\/id152566009\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noreferrer noopener\">The Sports Psychology Podcast<\/a>\u00a0<\/strong>on iTunes<br>*Subscribe to<strong> <a href=\"https:\/\/open.spotify.com\/show\/0ynyaalKxbnNmsoeL8gF5X?si=8224669de9b3435b\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noreferrer noopener\">The Sports Psychology Podcast<\/a> <\/strong>on Spotify<\/p>\n\n\n\n<hr class=\"wp-block-separator has-css-opacity is-style-dots\"\/>\n\n\n\n<h3 class=\"wp-block-heading\"><span class=\"ez-toc-section\" id=\"Improve_Your_Mental_Game_From_Anywhere_In_The_World\"><\/span><strong>Improve Your Mental Game From Anywhere In The World<\/strong><span class=\"ez-toc-section-end\"><\/span><\/h3>\n\n\n<div class=\"wp-block-image\">\n<figure class=\"alignright is-resized\"><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" width=\"150\" height=\"150\" src=\"https:\/\/www.youthsportspsychology.com\/youth_sports_psychology_blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/11\/mental-training-for-young-athletes.png\" alt=\"\" class=\"wp-image-6868\" style=\"width:138px;height:auto\"\/><\/figure>\n<\/div>\n\n\n<p>We\u2019re certain that, as a parent,&nbsp;you want to help your child develop confidence and discipline in sports and life.&nbsp;And as a sports parent, you\u2019d love for your children to reach their potential in sports.&nbsp;But encouraging your child to <strong>strive for greatness without pressuring them<\/strong> can be a challenge.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>You can get expert mental coaching with us from anywhere. Meet with us via Zoom, Skype, FaceTime or phone call. With today\u2019s video technology, we are able to connect with athletes and coaches all over the globe.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"has-text-align-center\"><strong>Call Us Today to Schedule Your Free 15-Minute Session.<\/strong><br><strong>Find Out How Your Athlete Can Benefit From One-on-One Mental Coaching!<\/strong><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>Feeling Unsafe in Youth Sports Steve, a sports dad and coach, recently called us to tell us about the worst thing that can happen to a talented young athlete, from a mental-game perspective. A 14-year-old hockey goalie was offered a position on a high-level team in a different state, and &#8230; <a title=\"When Young Athletes Drop Out of Sport Due to Bullying\" class=\"read-more\" href=\"https:\/\/www.youthsportspsychology.com\/youth_sports_psychology_blog\/when-young-athletes-drop-out-of-sport-due-to-bullying\/\" aria-label=\"Read more about When Young Athletes Drop Out of Sport Due to Bullying\">Read Sport Psychology Tip<\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":3629,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[180,25,6],"tags":[91,172,182,251],"class_list":["post-924","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-bullying-in-sports-kids-in-sports","category-youth-sports-coach","category-youth-sports-psychology-blog","tag-bullying","tag-sport-psychology","tag-sports-parents","tag-youth-sports","resize-featured-image"],"aioseo_notices":[],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.youthsportspsychology.com\/youth_sports_psychology_blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/924","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.youthsportspsychology.com\/youth_sports_psychology_blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.youthsportspsychology.com\/youth_sports_psychology_blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.youthsportspsychology.com\/youth_sports_psychology_blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.youthsportspsychology.com\/youth_sports_psychology_blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=924"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/www.youthsportspsychology.com\/youth_sports_psychology_blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/924\/revisions"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.youthsportspsychology.com\/youth_sports_psychology_blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/3629"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.youthsportspsychology.com\/youth_sports_psychology_blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=924"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.youthsportspsychology.com\/youth_sports_psychology_blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=924"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.youthsportspsychology.com\/youth_sports_psychology_blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=924"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}